9
by the romanov killer
Summary: // 1x2, implied 3x4, post-war // It is A.C. 205, ten years after the war, and Duo Maxwell finds himself living a life of normalcy in the salvaging business. But the best-laid plans of mice and men go oft awry, especially when the heart's involved.
1. 9 Crimes

"**9**"

By L. Valensi

**SUMMARY**  
The story is set in A.C. 205, little less than ten years since the series ended in Endless Waltz. It centers around the new life of Gundam pilot Duo Maxwell, who co-owns a prosperous salvaging company with Hilde Schbeiker. Just as life looks as if it's going as well as it ever will, things in the business world go awry and Duo's new life spins out of control. The people that he loves start dying once again, one by one disappearing from what he thought was a perfect life. And to add insult to injury, all the events may lead up to something both the Earth and the Colonies were hoping to avoid: war. Duo seeks help from old friends, but finds himself in a precarious situation where he will have to choose between his heart and his life.

**DISCLAIMER**  
Before you read this, be aware that this is 1x2 fanfiction, meaning it involves a relationship between two males (specifically Heero and Duo). I do not own Gundam Wing nor do I own the characters. All events and terminology related to the canon GW belong to the creators. The title of the story, as well as the chapter names, are taken directly from Damien Rice's most recent album, "9" (buy it—it's heartbreakingly fantastic). All criticism, especially concerning terminology/time discrepancies/facts, are heartily welcome. On to the story!

--

Chapter One

9 Crimes

--

-- Leave me out with the waste—this is not what I do  
-- It's the wrong kind of place to be thinking of you  
-- It's the wrong time for somebody new  
-- It's a small crime, and I've got no excuse  
-- And is that alright with you—  
-- If I give my gun away when it's loaded?

--

A.C. 205 – The Graveyard, After the Fire

Duo Maxwell can't pinpoint exactly when he'd started smoking—but he has an inkling it was the moment when, in what the papers called a "freak accident," a mysterious fire consumed his homely salvaging business. He doesn't know exactly when he began to breathe life back into the soul of his resting alter ego, the God of Death—but he's fairly sure it was the instant he realized that the body of his friend and business partner, Hilde Schbeiker, was nowhere to be found.

He's found only a video-note: "Our turn," it displays tersely, possibly expecting Duo to understand the where-and-why of it. Duo rubs his temples with his cigarette hand, trying to press the nicotine into his skin, hoping with an acolyte's faith that the drug, if applied closer to his brain, will make a difference.

Oh, Hilde's alive—Duo has no doubt of that. He's sure of the _why_, too. (In hindsight, Duo understands that he should not have risked 'salvaging' what he knew was private property from the Leo Minor network on the slowly degenerating Southside of L2. But in return, he gained the trust and local political control of the Northern Canes Venatici network—what self-respecting businessman could refuse that? He didn't like the Leo Minor that much, anyway—sooner or later he would have found a way to get rid of them and their penchant for kidnapping child recruits.) He just didn't understand, at the moment, why they would bother with such a ridiculous plan to get him to hand over what he'd stolen. As he sees it, they would have achieved more by killing themselves.

Duo sighs, and in one motion both kills the cigarette and stands up, dusting the ashes from his trousers, leaving trails of white in his fingers' wake. He walks with measured steps (an attempt to remain calm) towards a polished mahogany cabinet with gold gargoyle knobs. The cabinet is one of about five ornaments of color in Duo's miniscule apartment home, which consists of an office, a bedroom, a kitchen, and a bathroom –all sparsely decorated (somewhat of a departure from the chatty, uplifting nature the ex-pilot maintains).

The door swings out to reveal a full-length mirror, which inspects the notable differences between Duo at the end of the Mariemaia Incident and the present. It detects that since the youth reached adulthood at the end of A.C. 198, a significant two feet carefully added their effects onto Duo's still-muscular body. The mirror considers it a miraculous growth, which overshadows the extra foot Duo allowed his hair to grow to match his towering height. Though he still holds the face of a boy, the mirror acknowledges that Duo Maxwell is who he claims to be—proven by the darkness of his visage as he turns to face himself, the God of Death.

As much as he would like to say that the Death in him has washed away with the light of peace offered by Earth Sphere United Nation and its new Vice Foreign Minister, Duo can't—he can see by the shadows around his eyes and the glint in his indigo irises that he can't ever refuse the call of the hunt. He, on more than one occasion, has asked himself whether or not he is really alive—if there is ever really a reason to continue, or if he is forever doomed to seek some kind of war.

He adjusts his priest's collar and the golden cross beneath it. He walks back to his desk, sits down, and calls for the video receiver. He dials a number and decides he will think about it all later after he locates Hilde and kills the motherfucker who took her.

--

A.C. 205 – The Winner Estate

Quatre Raberba-Winner is sitting peacefully with a teacup in one hand and handing Trowa Barton a cup of his own with the other. Neither has changed too much—each man has grown according to their genes and are properly dressed as young men are supposed to be, Quatre more so. Trowa Barton's face is gleaming with a tenderness that was rare in the past, except perhaps in Quatre. They sit in silence, drinking and glancing at the differences in each other's demeanor.

"You're staying for a while this time, won't you?" Quatre asks, confident in the answer. He smiles, not having seen much of any of the other pilots since they parted ways. Though, he gladly manages to keep in closer touch with Trowa more than the others, as he personally attends each performance his circus holds in Quatre's area. And Trowa, in return, makes sure there is a performance there each tour. "You and the others have been working quite hard for a while now. It's only right if you stop a little bit, isn't it?"

Trowa nods, drinking the last of the cup's steamy contents. "I've told Catherine to disband for a little while, to give us all a general vacation," He says, with both his patented calm and a degree of newfound warmth, "so, I'm able to stay longer. That is, if it's no trouble to you,"

"Trouble?" Quatre asks with a soft laugh. "My, Trowa, if you're trouble, I wouldn't know how to survive in something like a war."

The two laugh vocally and steadily, and look at each other with longing eyes, sharing the irony and basking in the freedom of their simple actions.

A slight Arabian man in beige garb enters the room, bowing towards Quatre. "I'm sorry to intrude, Master Winner, but Mr. Maxwell is waiting on the receiver for you,"

"Thank you, Mustafa, we will take the call from here," Quatre says, nodding politely to the man with smile. A slim receiver lined in sand-colored, polished stone rises from a compartment inside the table to their right, displaying Duo Maxwell with every pretense of mischievous joy exhibited on his boyish face.

"Hey Qu—whoa," Duo says, widening his eyes. "Is there some sort of pilot reunion call I missed?"

"No," Trowa says with a small smile. "I'm just staying with Quatre for a while."

"Oh, I _see_," Duo says, his tone betraying his subtlety.

"Would you like to join us, Duo?" Quatre interjects quickly. "Trowa's here while his troupe is on vacation. You owe yourself one too, after what happened,"

"About that," Duo says, his voice losing a degree of its initial happiness. "Listen, Quatre, I need help in locating Hilde."

Quatre looks at his friend helplessly, turning to Trowa for advice. The other lowered his eyes in silent pity. It must have hit him hard, losing Hilde, Quatre thinks as he looks desperately at Duo. The silence between them grows and neither Quatre nor Trowa are sure of how to answer Duo's request.

"Look, if you can't do it or whatever, it's okay," Duo says, a little irritated at the blank looks on their faces.

"No, it's not that, Duo, it's just…"

"Just…_what_?"

"They reported Hilde as dead, Duo," Trowa says, with a look of true concern. Quatre's face falls in what looked like sadness. Duo freezes, blinks, and laughs out loud, causing the other two men to both worry and to observe him confusedly.

"Duo?"

"Ah, I'm sorry, guys," Duo says, out of breath. "I completely forgot about _that_."

"Forgot about what, Duo?" Trowa queries, more than a little unsettled.

"Well, uh," Duo stammers. "You see…"

"Out with it, Maxwell,"

"Alright," Duo says seriously, smiling grimly. "But don't act like you didn't see it coming."

The two ex-pilots share a look, noting with a wordless understanding that their friend, Duo Maxwell, has been productive in peacetime—though with what they both feel as something forebodingly dangerous. They look at Duo once more with their full attention, both sensing an underlying and seething anger in the smiling American.

--

A.C. 197 – The Graveyard

Duo sits behind a cherry oak desk, lightly decorated with a single rose in a glass vase and a picture turned away from the three young men seated on the other side. The trio fidgets from time to time as Duo reviews their résumés in thoughtful silence. Though Duo looks far younger than the three men before him, even they know his history—and, furthermore, can all feel an aura of force around him that unsettles the very pits of their stomachs.

Duo looks up with a disarming smile, which serves to initially frighten and then calm the three men.

"I gotta say, guys, you didn't really need these," Duo says cheerily, stuffing the papers into a wastebin beside him. "All you had to do was tell me you needed a job. You guys seem like real decent people, y'know? We'll be glad to give you a place here, no problem."

The three men grip their seats in order for them to keep from jumping up in surprise and joy.

"Ah, well, don't look so surprised, gentlemen," Duo says, grinning broadly. A petite, yet well-toned young woman in tight-fitting army garb enters the dark office, shedding light upon the three men and Duo's smiling countenance. "Aw, Hilde, you know I don't like it when you barge in like that."

"Well, did you hire them or not? Because I got a craft ready and I'm not seeing anybody in it except for me," Hilde says, hands on hips.

"We'll find you gentlemen some lodging and get you your startup money after we get a little work done," Duo tells them reassuringly. He stands up to put an arm around the slightly-vexed Hilde and smiles. "Sonny, Won-ton, Axe—welcome to the network! Now let's get to salvaging, eh?"

--

A.C. 199 – The Graveyard

Hilde comes bouncing into Duo's office, which is considerably more furnished than before—floor-to-ceiling bookshelves, an antique vase full of fresh-cut roses, another picture frame, and richly-framed original paintings by a now-famous Sonny da Vinci. Duo shields his face from the burst of light and crinkles his nose at Hilde and the young man trapped in her grip.

"Guess who passed the STAR exam and is coming to visit us after landing a new job with the L2 Justice Department?" Hilde asks rhetorically, hugging the brunette beside her with full force. Duo jumps up with a wide smile, joining the embrace.

"Axel Drummond, you goddamn overachieving bastard, you!" Duo says, rubbing Axel's well-groomed head with his gloved knuckles. Hilde laughs and lets go, and Duo follows, though keeping his hands on Axel's shoulders. He embraces the other man earnestly, patting him on the back before releasing him. "We're really proud of you, Axe,"

The young man beams and kneels before Duo unexpectedly, taking Duo's gloved hand and removing the article of clothing. Duo begins to protest but is silenced by Axel's lips touching the back of his hand.

"I should be thanking you, my Brother," Axel says quietly but proudly, pressing Duo's hand to his temple.

Hilde watches silently in the background, very much shocked at Axel's strange actions. Duo looks towards Hilde, questioning what was happening, but accepts Axel's motions as Earthly tradition that he didn't understand.

"You don't have to do all that, Axe," Duo says with a light chuckle, bringing the other, probably older man to his feet. "I'm just glad you were able to do what you've always wanted."

"No, Brother, you don't understand," Axel says seriously. "You have given me a new, better life. And for that, I owe you mine. I'm forever in your debt."

"Listen, Axel, this really isn't necessary—"

"Believe me, Brother. Don't ever hesitate to call on me for anything. I am at your beck and call, whatever it may be."

Duo exhales, finding it futile to change the hardheaded lawyer's mind. He smiles and shakes Axel's hand firmly.

"Alright, then, Counselor, I accept. Good luck to you out there and remember that you're always welcome here."

--

A.C. 200 – The Graveyard

"They're calling us the Maxwell Network," Hilde says with a smirk and a sarcastic roll of her eyes. "Little do they know this pile of heap is nothin' without pretty old me."

Duo shakes his head and sighs, head on his palm. "Is that some weird phenomenon on Earth, too? I'll admit, I thought the hand-kissing was just some kind of tribute of respect, but they've actually pegged us with a name because of all this nonsense."

"Isn't it flattering, though, Duo? I mean, the business is going insanely well with all the connections we're making and the freedom we've gained, what with Axel, Carmine, Jion, and Marisela essentially buying that new legislation that allows cross-colony salvaging sans excise taxation. And Morty and Kilo are heading our area's police force and going easy on our less-than-legal excursions into factory backyards."

"I know, I know, Hilde. I'm extremely pleased with all the progress your business has made," Duo says, "but I'm pretty sure this moniker is just going to bring bad news. They're going to start suspecting we're some sort of rebel group and then the government's gonna start investigating if we're harmful to the peace and then everything's gonna go downhill from there."

Hilde rounds the corners of the desk and places her hands on Duo's tensed shoulders, easing them with soft massages. "Just look at it as free publicity, Mr. Paranoid," She says, giving him a soft hug. Duo relaxes slightly and puts The Lagrange Chronicle down. Hilde kisses him on the cheek.

"Hilde," Duo says, with a rather tired and vexed tone. Hilde releases her grip on him and moves for the door. She turns around with a small smile.

"Don't worry, Duo. It's just a name."

--

A.C. 200 – Lagrange Two Periphery, Unnamed Area 526

The small salvaging spacecrafts, which Duo aptly named Maxwell's Demon and the Schbeikerschklist (he was particularly proud of this), roved around a previously undiscovered area around the L2's borders. There's a respectable amount of dispensed cargo shuttles clustered around what looks to Duo like a magnetically charged hunk of rock, possibly containing rare minerals.

"Don't even think about it, Maxwell," Hilde warns, pointing to the full load they had on both spacecrafts. This slightly annoys him, as they had ordered two bigger ships earlier in the month. It had taken them three more months to figure out what to do with the money they had amassed without drawing too much attention to the prosperity of their business.

Lately, salvaging businesses became more common around the edges of L2, whether they were locally started or other colonial businesses found legislation to be more lax in L2 than the other colonies. Naturally, Duo encouraged this in the beginning, as by that time, their business had flourished enough for both he and Hilde to live comfortably if they decided to shut down.

The downside to the competition was just that—competition. The businesses that started up were rarely dependent on their own workers and skills—they were often more focused on scrounging up whatever Duo couldn't take with him, and very effectively at that. (This hyena-like behavior irks him to no end, as sometimes he can't give his employees assignments for days on end while he and Hilde mapped out new areas to scavenge.)

Decent workers that were steadily streaming in from Earth and other colonies were winding up in bad working conditions in other salvaging businesses, which, more than often, espoused the idea that Duo's business was the devil amidst them, and that it must be put out of business if L2 was to enjoy a monopoly-free atmosphere.

Now, the real salvaging businesses that Duo respected for their integrity were also beginning to zone in on that idea, despite the mutual agreement they had with each other to compete in peace. In a strange turn of events, as soon as Duo's business earned the name the Maxwell Network, the other businesses coined names of their own. There were four other particularly well-established salvaging businesses: the Networks, however, were named relative to their owners: respectively, the Canis Major (the Dog Pound) in the West; the Volans (the Shoreline Salvaging Company) in the East; the Canes Venatici (Vultures Incorporated) in the North; and the Orion (the Hunter's Lodge) in the South.

Duo sighs and spies from the corner of his eyes the faint silhouette of veiled rival spacecrafts on the cargo shuttles, waiting for his departure from the site.

"Don't worry, Duo, we're good for another month of work. We may even be able to send Rider and the other recruits tomorrow by themselves if the new ships come in," Hilde says in the video receiver below him.

"It's just dumb for them to go on like this, always trying to provoke fights by outright foul play," Duo says, flatly irritated. "I won't have it, but they're bound to piss off someone else. Each other, maybe. Haven't these people had enough of war?"

"That would be betraying human nature, Duo," Hilde says with a tired sigh. "You give 'em enough peace and they're hankering for a whole new OZ to rain hell on the galaxy."

Duo smirks grimly and keeps quiet, docking in silence.

--

A.C. 203 – The Graveyard

_Representative Won Tonshu Assassinated in L2 Home_, reads the Chronicle's main headline.

The newspaper is crumpled within the confines of Duo's hands and is promptly slammed onto the table. Duo curls his fist and punches directly through his window, spraying shattered glass around him. He can feel his knuckles welling up with blood from the impact, but the pain felt less real than the despair vibrating in his blood. He sinks to his knees in a desperate attempt to hold his growingly fragile spirit together. The list keeps growing, he thinks, and I still don't know what to do to stop it.

"They really know how to piss somebody off, don't they," He whispers weakly, having heard Hilde enter quietly to see what he had done. He feels her hands encircle his shoulders and her head prop itself on his arm.

"Duo, I'm sorry," She says softly.

"He didn't deserve this. Rider didn't fucking deserve this. Jimmy hadn't even been with us two weeks and he was a good kid," Duo shudders and Hilde holds on in fear that he'll break. It's a moment or two of silence before Duo stops shaking and Hilde is able to let him go.

He stands up and retrieves a black leather jacket from his closet. He turns towards Hilde, with an expression eerily similar to the one he wore while piloting Deathscythe, and says, "I'll be back in the morning. Don't wait up."

Hilde swears that, despite the blurred image of Duo behind her tears, as Duo moved towards the sunset, she saw the shadow of demon wings follow the ex-pilot.

--

A.C. 203 – Lion's Den

Duo, unmatched by any living being in stealth operations still, proves his excellent skill retention by seamlessly infiltrating the headquarters of the Leo Minor Network through air ducts extending to the nearby shipment factory it boasts. Fortunately, since peacetime, the majority of the population has been low-inclined to gain knowledge of combat and weapon tactics. (If the rage hadn't convinced him to don his God of Death alter-ego once more, Duo would have more reservations in picking off the unsuspecting guards, one by one, but that's not the case.) Duo reaches his point of interest—that being the office of Victor Leo Minor, head of the network.

"You know how I hate unannounced guests, Mr. Maxwell," Minor says with an arrogant smile. Duo spies his hand move towards the bottom edge of the desk between them, no doubt to signal his goonies to play guard dog before Duo has the chance to off with his head. "Unfortunately, I don't have room in my schedule for your attempt at grieving right now."

Duo cocks his head innocently at the much older man, playing his youthful role in order to distract the other from his fatal situation. Under the shadows produced by his baseball cap, Minor is unable to see the blood-stopping anger in Duo's eyes.

"Well, y'know, I've only really got about a minute's worth to say, so let's just stay still a little bit, won't we?" Duo says with an entirely morphed tone of voice, which is at once cold as well as gleeful.

The longer Minor is alone in the room, the less confident he appears. He's wondering what's taking the others so long to come to his aid. The approaching figure of Duo Maxwell, cloaked in darkness, is causing him considerable mental stress. It can't possibly be, Minor thinks, I can't get trapped by this—this _kid_.

"You're a lot less talkative than I expected you to be," Duo chuckles, seating himself in the chair in front of Minor's desk. Minor's hands inch toward his desk to grab his gun and prevent his death, but is frozen in place when Duo says, "Move your hand away from that drawer and I might even give you room to apologize before I blow your fucking head off."

Minor sits back, realizing the ramifications of his actions. But he's just a kid, Minor thinks, just a fucking kid! His heart pumps enough blood to cause his pale, fat face to fill with redness. The anxiety alone is enough to send him reeling into unconsciousness, but the hidden face of the boy before him is keeping him paralyzed, as if one tilt of that head and one look into his eyes will turn him into stone.

"Mack," Duo says, almost upbeat, flicking a bloody finger like a burnt-out cigarette across the table to Minor's chest. "Lyle, Scamp, Sugar, and Tony," Duo says in a sing-song tone, grinning like a madman as the body parts stain Minor's pressed white suit. "I took the liberty of taking two of your guys for every one of my brothers you took, without permission, from me," Duo seethes.

"Oops," He says softly, momentarily confusing the still Minor. Silence lays out between the two men before Duo shoots Victor Leo Minor square in the eyes. "Forgot one," Duo cheerily remarks.

--

A.C. 204 – The Graveyard

"We believe in the resurrection of the dead and the life of the world to come, Amen."

The priest proceeds to shower three decorated graves with holy water as several of the Graveyard's workers finish their prayers and depart to ship off to their next assignment. Duo, however, remains behind with Hilde at his side.

"You never did tell me what you did to avenge them, Duo," Hilde says, wistfully looking at the three graves.

"I didn't have to do anything, Hilde," Duo says, laughing. "Death dealt with the bastards who killed our brothers better than I ever could."

"If I'm not mistaken, Duo, you _are_ Death, aren't you?" She says knowingly.

"You very well are, my dear Hilde," He replies. She looks at him disapprovingly. "I run, I hide, but I never lie, Hilde. It was Death himself. Nothing to do with me."

The two leave the graves and return to the docking area. They look proudly at the three new shiny ships, named Jimmy, Rider, and Won-ton, greeting them with their brand-new trademark clear for the colony to see.

Duo whistles, acting mighty impressed. "Ain't they bee-yoo-tiful?"

Hilde nods as she accepts a handful of paperwork from the head delivery pilot, flipping through them with interest.

"I'm gonna go ahead and take old Demon for a quick periphery sweep, okay?" Duo says, already making motions to board the spacecraft.

"Alright. Don't bring back too much, if you find anything at all. I still have to reorganize last night's collection into the additional bins, which in turn still have to be properly labeled," Hilde sighs, looking up from the paperwork. "In other words, I gotta do all the dirty work, so don't add to the shit load, okay, Maxwell?"

"Gotcha, boss," Duo says, grinning and rocketing irresponsibly fast out of the atmosphere.

--

As Duo attempts to contact Hilde for a clear docking zone, he finds the connection unable to link him to her. Moreover, as he closes in on the Graveyard's location, he realizes that the entire block seems to be covered in heavy, opaque smog. Duo cries out in disbelief, ironically cursing himself as he finds a clear field to land.

He makes a desperate race towards the Graveyard and finds nothing but smoldering rubble and yellow tape preventing his entrance. He stares in horror.

Hilde, he thinks, Where's Hilde?

He runs around the entire area, looking for any sign of the blue-haired German. He pulls aside a paramedic violently, asking, "Did you find Hilde Schbeiker?"

The paramedic, already harried from the rescue, exclaims, "No! Look, we don't know who's who yet. The fire just happened a little while ago. Now, if you excuse me, people are dying. Let me do my job."

Duo, helpless, lets him go and turns his attention back to the fire.

--

He sneaks into his office as the sun sets and the police become entangled with civilian questions. He looks around for any sign of Hilde, any part that can possibly quell the sickness in his stomach and tell him whether he should be angry or grieving terribly. But instead he finds nothing of significance.

He thinks back, cursing himself for leaving her unprotected. But he never could have seen this attack coming—after all, everything had been peaceful after the Leo Minor incident, which he and the other four networks agreed happened for the better. It seems so out of place, so—

Until he remembers what he'd managed to steal from Leo Minor, and the rumored involvement of the Volans Network being in business to obtain it.

Shit, Duo thinks. He falls to his knees and rubs his temples, retrieving a cigarette case full of dusty Sobranies. "I didn't think I'd ever need one of these, Howard," He says, attempting to suppress any overwhelming emotion with the memory of his awkwardly-dressed mentor handing him a case of cigarettes for his twentieth birthday.

He uses the dying fire to light the slim, black cigarette and in the process spies a beeping piece of metal in the burning carbon that used to be his desk. He attempts to pick it up, but finds his fingers slightly burned. He puts on his gloves and stealthily plays hot-potato to bring the video-note to a cooler environment.

The note escapes his grip and makes tinkling noises as it falls a few feet away from Duo, revealing only two words.

--

A.C. 205 – The Graveyard

"What the note said doesn't matter," Duo says, not meaning to allow his anger to seep through his farcical routine. "What matters is that I need your help in finding Hilde. They've taken her hostage somewhere, and the Volans Network consists of old pre-colonial businessmen with wiles and connections just like your father had."

"What was it that you stole?" Trowa asks, still calm in his seat.

"Look, Trowa, I'm short on time," Duo says, knowledgeable of his evasion. By the looks of it, Trowa is as well. "I just want to know if you can help me or not."

"I'll see what I can do, Duo, but most of the systems in general are undergoing renovation right now at the Winner Estate," Quatre replies honestly. "I can't promise instant results on her whereabouts."

"You should ask Heero for help," Trowa offers. "As the Foreign Minister's bodyguard, he has free reign of the ESUN's anti-war technology, which should help you greatly—probably more effectively than Quatre's technology can at the moment."

The look on Duo's face says exactly what he is thinking, despite his best efforts to hide it: Fuck, he thinks, I was hoping it wasn't going to come to that.

"Alright. Thanks, Quatre, Trowa," Duo says, visibly fatigued. "I'll talk to you soon."

"You're welcome, Duo," Quatre says kindly. "I will try my best… believe me. Trowa and I will put our best efforts into finding Hilde for you. Good-bye, my friend."

"Yeah. See ya," Duo gives a wave good-bye and a big grin before shutting off the video-receiver and lighting another cigarette. He looks at the seven cigarettes still left in the embroidered titanium case.

This is the wrong time to be thinking of you, he says to himself.

--

**NOTES**

- The names of the Networks are taken from constellations.

- For future reference (I'm sure I make another one), Maxwell's demon is, according to Wikipedia, "an 1867 thought experiment ... meant to raise questions about the possibility of violating the second law of thermodynamics."

- All the names of Duo's employees, with the exception of Axel and Won Tonshu, are supposed to be reminiscent of street gangs and/or the mafia. Axel is taken from Kingdom Hearts II's Axel (my favorite KH character); Won Tonshu was a ridiculously punny afterthought.

- The type of Sobranies I mention at the Sobranie Black Russians, black cigarettes with gold filters.


	2. The Animals Were Gone

Chapter Two

The Animals Were Gone

--

-- Woke up and for the first time the animals were gone—  
-- It's left this house empty now, not sure if I belong  
-- Yesterday you asked me to write you a pleasant song;  
-- I'll do my best now, but you've been gone for so long

--

A.C. 205 – International Course 606 (Old Eurasia Pathway) to Sanc Kingdom

Duo Maxwell, despite the nausea churning in his stomach, is fifty miles from the Peace Wing, where one Heero Yuy is supposed to reside. He more-than-vaguely remembers and relives his life as the former Gundam pilot's partner in his head as he flies down the road. He knows he should be focused on sorting the details of Hilde's kidnapping in his head so as to cleanly relay them to the Principal of Peace, Heero Yuy, but his mind wraps around a less mature emotion.

What are you hoping for anyway? He thinks.

A loud beeping distracts him before his thoughts stray to answers. In less than second, Trowa's voice diffuses into his head.

"How far are you now?" He asks.

"Approximately ten point six miles," Duo mutters. "You got anything?"

"It's really difficult from where we are, Duo. We're essentially forced to work with the old technology—everything is being converted. They need it to become compatible to the new Hylic system. Luckily for you, the ESUN's fully equipped not only with a Hylic system, but records on virtually everything and everyone, hack-free."

A pause. "I guess."

"You don't sound too pleased."

"This isn't necessarily anything to go directly to the government with. They love their peace, remember? I'll bet anything they'll bring the Preventers into this like it's some big terrorist ordeal when, really, it's just some just some rich, corporate-minded dickweeds wanting to knock me out of business."

"I understand. In any case, Duo, I called to inform you that despite our handicap, we managed to find a lead in your search, though keep in mind it could be a farce or even a trap," Duo nods, freshly recalling mistakes from their past. "But if it is indeed the Volans network responsible for Hilde, then you might want to start your search in the English Channel area. We intercepted an e-mail from one of the higher-ranked members stating that Karluv Volans is setting up an accounting satellite there."

"You're thinking that all the Big Bad boys are gonna be there at one point to check out their latest investment?"

"The e-mail doesn't specify, but it's precisely why you should look into it with Heero's help before diving in."

"Roger. Guess that time is now. Thanks, Trowa."

"Good luck, Duo."

Duo stops, removes his helmet, and realizes that his hair tie's disappeared, leaving his hair an annoying mess around him.

"Balls," He says.

--

A.C. 205 – Sanc Kingdom: The Peace Wing

Duo feels grandly out of place in the Peacecraft Estate, as he's surrounded by figures in immaculate white. As per usual, he's wearing all black—from the matte of his pressed coat to the squeak-shine of his shoes, Duo's a shadow amongst the Peace Wing's angelic constituents. Like a demon of great beauty, with his chestnut locks of earthly desires grasping at their unsuspecting prey, Duo strolls to a quaint desk in front of two opaque glass doors, where a young woman stares at him in awe.

Duo smiles at her but does not remove his sunglasses. He clears his throat to break the ice and she recovers from her jaw-dropped state to acknowledge him.

"Ho—How, I mean, may I help you, sir?" She stammers unprofessionally.

"I'm hoping you can, Miss… Sphinx, isn't it?" Duo says sweetly, though with a level of amusement only recognizable to himself. She blushes and Duo forces back a laugh. "Is Principal Yuy in today?"

"Well—um—I'm so, so sorry, um, Mr…"

"Maxwell,"

"Oh—yes—I'm sorry, Mr. Maxwell, but Mr. Yuy is in an important meeting."

"All day?"

"For the rest of the week, actually."

"And there's no way I can set an appointment?"

"I'm afraid not. Principal Yuy is a busy man."

"Can you contact him really quickly? At all? Tell him it's his old buddy, Duo Maxwell. Surely he'll talk to me for just a little bit."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Duo—I mean, Mr. Maxwell, I just… I can't… He'd be very displeased that he's been interrupted,"

"Trust me, Miss Sphinx, he won't mind my interruption at all. Why don't you let me talk to him instead? Just dial the number. I got it from there."

"I'm sorry, sir, I just—"

"Is there a problem, Miss Sphinx?"

Duo had imagined this scenario differently. He'd imagined he'd feel only happiness at seeing Heero, but it isn't the case. Happy, yes—but the apprehension is greater than he'd anticipated. He turns around to face the man owning the still-familiar tenor of his ex-partner, Heero Yuy.

"No, no problem, Principal Yuy. I—I told Mr. Maxwell you'll be busy all week. But he—" Miss Sphinx's voice drifts into the background and Duo hears only these words from Heero's enchanting lips:

"No braid," He says.

--

The two walk in silence, with Duo trailing slightly behind, feigning interest in his surroundings. They pass numerous glass rooms in the main hallway, everything pristinely ivory. Although many heads turn to address the Principal ahead of him, all of their peaceful eyes gaze to the consuming figure of breathtaking darkness behind him.

"Nice place you've got here, Heero," Duo says with all the interest he can muster. He doesn't realize that Heero has stopped and leans on him accidentally.

"Have you lost all sense of perception in this peace, Duo?" Heero asks.

Duo steps back with a small smile. "Maybe," He says, "But I see you've lost none of that caustic charm.

"You'll have to excuse me, Heero," he continues, following more carefully as Heero opens the door before them. "My intention for coming wasn't necessarily just to hang out, though it would be nice to catch up."

"Step inside," Heero says, opening the only opaque door in the surrounding area. Duo walks inside, an awkward fear developing in his stomach. Heero locks the door behind them and follows suit, sitting in the red-lined armchair by the only clear window, revealing the picturesque ocean-side view of the Peace Wing. Duo pretends to sit nonchalantly in the matching loveseat directly across from Heero. "I believe this has something to do with Hilde?" He asks.

Duo's purposely wandering eyes stop at Heero. "You been keeping up with colony news, or what?"

"What happens to ex-Gundam pilots is not just colony news to me, Duo,"

"Yeah, apparently you're significantly busy… according to that pretty young thing you've got working your precious schedule,"

"I only have her say that because it's the truth."

"Well, I don't mean to cut into your important meeting time, you know," Duo says, slightly apologetic, though what he feels is much closer to a dead-set hope on leaving quickly. He sighs and prepares himself for departure.

"You're not," Heero says. "I knew you would come."

Duo looks to him expectantly, but Heero is looking out the window.

Heero turns to him and Duo finally notices the strange new qualities that have made themselves a part of Heero since the end of the wars. There is a softness in Heero's eyes that Duo used to look for (he even remembers the night he spent wondering about whether or not Heero looked at the moon in appreciation). He's older, but his age only seemed to introduce him to the youthful tenderness he didn't have a chance to learn. Duo assumes that being surrounded with so much peace must change a person—even Heero Yuy.

"She's not dead," Duo reveals somewhat hesitantly. "And I know that Volans is behind it. But I can't prove it. I don't know where I'll find her. I don't think they'll keep her in their offices and I don't have the kind of systems from before the war that can make finding her possible. I honestly didn't think this kind of thing would ever happen again.

"Look, Heero. I know it's a lot to ask for, but all I really need is a computer and access to some files, and I can go from there. If you can't or don't want to help me, it's okay, I understand. If not, then you can just look at this as a visit from an old friend. Okay, Heero?"

Heero remains still, gazing at the ocean. A long, strange moment of silence plays between them again—which only serves to disarm Duo, imposing calm on him despite the adrenaline coursing through his body.

"Ten years and you still managed to keep your ability of talking too much and not very well," Heero stands up and walks towards a desk with only a square, black screen in the middle. "This is the reason you could not go to Quatre for help."

Duo watches as various projected screens appear three-dimensionally around Heero and him. Heero proceeds to approach several screens, touching them to elicit commands. Duo gazes at it dumbstruck.

"This is the… the Hylic system, or whatever Trowa called it?" Duo asks.

"Yes," Heero answers succinctly, inputting various codes in order to access the Shoreline Salvaging Company databases available to the government, i.e. legal documents, financial reports, employee records, etcetera. A screen pops up directly in front of Duo, surprising him, but he's quick to realize the importance of the news Heero's displayed in front of him.

"Keith Marcel, Vice President of the Shoreline Salvaging Company," Heero states, "Second in command to Karluv Volans… scheduled to a contract signing in the E-Cluster with the fledgling company Amsel Baum, owned by Leighton Aves Corvus."

"E-Cluster XJ105667, the Corvus Estate," Duo mumbles. "But it can't be this easy to find them. It's too obvious. It's—"

"Are you certain Volans is responsible?" Heero interjects.

Duo pauses and looks at Heero quite seriously. "Are you suggesting that this is some hasty, groundless accusation? Because I didn't come here to have my intellect questioned."

"Then tell me _why_."

Duo remains silent, unable to bring himself to reveal anything.

"Duo, I don't know how you can expect anyone to help you if you aren't willing to share vital information—"

"It's not vital information!" Duo yells, too passionately for the situation. Heero sits gazing at him. "I just need to find Hilde. In order to do that, I need access to every possible location Volans is likely to access and to his every movement."

Heero continues to stare wordlessly at Duo, and Duo becomes physically ill. He does all he can to look away from the piercing blue of Heero's eyes, the mature curve of his slim jaw, the groomed wave of his muddy hair. In this surprising violence, Duo lets himself think what it is that he has tried so passively to repress: Just get up, he thinks. Just go. You were gone for so long. You were never supposed to turn back.

But before Duo could move, Heero says, "Okay."

Duo's forced by shock to meet Heero eye-to-eye. "Okay?"

"That's what friends are for, yes?" Heero says, startling Duo. Amused, he continues without acknowledging the other. "But I can't have you access the information. Your presence in the databases can be easily traced, especially with your unfamiliarity with the Hylic system commands, and it would draw unnecessary attention to my involvement with you. In the meanwhile, you should lay low. The Peace Wing can provide you with temporary housing—"

"No, there's no need for that," Duo interjects, standing up. "It's enough that you're getting information for me. That's all I came here for. I have to get back to L2 tonight to take care of some things."

"I'll update you as soon as possible. How should I contact you?"

"I would think you kids would know everything about me," Duo chides, regaining his usual composure.

"You take better precautions than others," Heero says, "It's part of our nature."

Duo smiles at the hint of nostalgia in Heero's voice. He gets up and heads for the door. "My bad," He says. "I meant, I thought _you_ would know everything about me."

Duo exits his office without waiting for a reply. He winks at Miss Sphinx, who's barely able to mutter a "Have a nice day, Mr. Maxwell!" with all the terrible pinkness of her face. Duo leaves the premises as demanding a presence as when he entered, and many are left wondering what the old God of Death was doing within their pristine little prison. However, Duo's unfazed by their paralysis; what he needs now is a good drink.

--

A.C. 205 – Outside the Graveyard

"Hot damn, Duo, I was just about to ask you for a drink before I realized you were the only man on L2 with a bigger cock than me," Duo's caught from behind by Sonny's remark; half tipsy and half emotionally shaken, he stumbles drunkenly into the long-haired redhead's arms. "Whoa, there, pretty lady. What's gotten into you, Duo? Are you drunk? I didn't even think that was possible! Ah, jeez, people will think I'm draggin' some massive hooker around the block with you like this. A renowned artist can't—"

"Shut. The Fuck. Up. Sonny," Duo gurgles. "Just take me back and lemme sleep for a coupl'a hours…"

"Christ, Big Brother, you're a fuckin' douche when you're drunk. Here I am, being a good guy, helpin' you out when I could be out bangin' some chicks and paintin' some art, and all you got to say to me is shut the fuck up? Hoo-boy, if Hilde were here, she'd smack you some…"

Duo's heart writhes inside his chest. He grabs a fistful of Sonny's shirt and pulls the redhead's face close to his.

"What the—"

"Sonny," Duo mumbles, "You are a fuckin' idiot sometimes, you know?"

Sonny stares at him. And then sighs. He continues walking.

"Yeah, I know, Big Bro," He says as Duo fades in and out of consciousness. "Sorry 'bout that."

--

A.C. 205 – Duo's Apartment, by The Graveyard

Three weeks after his visit to the Peace Wing, Duo manages to gather all intelligence possible on the Volans Network. Just as he is about to record new information regarding the nature of the business venture with Amsel Baum, the screen flickers to reveal none other than the Principal Heero Yuy.

"Good morning, Your Highness," Duo says with a smile.

"Any progress?"

"You know, I'm beginning to like these unannounced visits from you, Heero. It's like I'm having some sort of sordid internet affair with some high-class political official. It's exciting, it really is,"

"I take it you've found something interesting."

Duo is once again startled by Heero's keen perception. It actually depresses him a little that the other man makes him feel transparent. "Am I really so predictable, Heero?"

"Most people are."

Duo smiles wider this time and takes a sip of his coffee before continuing. "Well, let me stroke your ego no further. Before you so enchantingly appeared before me, I managed to find a strange clause in a contract uploaded to Keith Marcel,"

"The one dated for tonight?"

"Yeah," Duo says, holding up a printed copy with the clause highlighted. "It's a clause in the fine print that we skipped over a couple days ago, thinking it was just a reiteration of the points made a few clauses above it,"

"It's a… code?"

"Yeah—do you have a copy in front of you?" Heero nods, already in the process of highlighting the given passage. Duo stares as the other focuses intently and wonders why the other is offering so much help and interest. Heero looks up at him briefly with a questioning look on his face. Duo smiles innocently and doesn't look away.

Undoubtedly, if here were younger he would have been embarrassed by his overt suggestiveness, possibly even in denial of it. But years of living what you would call a "normal" life manages to remove the layers of differences between even a Gundam pilot and the everyday Joe trying to find the right job, the right path to happiness. Things like love, stability, and friendship became the diurnal; there was no longer a reason to shy away from making them priorities, or even just general thoughts.

Instead, Duo answers his look with, "Well, that's what I got to. I don't know exactly what to make of it, but I do know it's telling Marcel something. Look at the way the sentence that talks about "termination if no possible agreement breach is inconceivable against the special conditions stated in Clause 2-L." Tell me that makes no sense whatsoever. Right now, I think the code is some kind of anagram or—or some kind of play on syntax. It's strange. Usually, these bums deal with numbers, but I don't see any kind of numerical patterns, unless this is some kind of complicated mathe—"

"They're coming to kill you," Heero interrupts sternly.

"What? No," Duo replies, exasperated from thought. "No, that's too easy. That's the first thing that popped into my head."

"Occam's razor, Duo," Heero replies, putting the papers down. "You've seen it before."

A pause. "I know."

"So what's the matter?"

"Because that means they're going to compensate for their transparency."

"I see." Heero's turn to pause. "I'll make some arrangements, then."

"No, Heero, it's okay, really,"

"No, really, it's my job," Heero says resolutely. "I'm in this situation to mitigate a large-scale murder regarding an ex Gundam pilot, which would garner both publicity and the necessity of direct ESUN involvement."

Duo remains quiet for a moment, realizing the truth behind Heero's interest in his situation.

"I hope you have a place in mind to stow away all those affiliated with you," Heero continues. "I've arrange for them to take paid leaves from their respective occupations. Inform them as soon as you can, alright Duo?" A pause. "Are you still there, Duo?"

"Yeah, yeah, I am, I will, sorry about that," Duo says, fazed. "Just mentally preparing for tonight. I'll report to you as soon as I can."

"Alright."

"Thank you, by the way," Duo says, but Heero has already disappeared.

Duo sighs and leans back into his chair. He stares emptily at the screen.

What are you hoping for anyway? He thinks.

--

A.C. 205 – The Company Mansion

Duo sits sprawled out on a mahogany armchair, trying in vain to drill his thumbs into his temple. As usual, Sonny's late, making the rest of the others late—and all three of them are tired of waiting. Axel's been flipping through the Chronicle for what must be the fifth time and Morty's ignoring his fifteenth call from the precinct.

"Fuck it, boys," Duo says. "You can relay what I've got to say to that dumbass Sonny, if he hasn't already gotten Jion and the others into deep shit,"

"Really, Brother, your love for fairness far exceeds my own, and you've got no business in it," Axel says with a chuckle.

"Funny, Axel, but this does concern everyone, even Sonny, to a great degree," Duo sighs heavily and hands them each a bundle of papers. "I should have done this earlier, but to make it simple and clean, I'm putting you all under house arrest for an indefinite amount of time."

Duo doesn't bother to look at their slack-jawed, wide-eyed reactions. He can feel the seething anger seep into his skin already. After a great moment of silence, Axel clears his throat and cracks his knuckles.

"Perhaps I spoke a little too soon," Axel mumbles grimly, leafing through the papers at hand. "How is it that you were able to exact these government compensations so quickly and for so many people?"

"I think the more pressing question here is why the hell are you doing this to us, Brother? Don't you think we can fend for ourselves?" Duo flinches briefly at the rage in Morty's voice.

"Morty, I'm sorry, but I can't underestimate the lengths my enemies will go to in order to get to me. They've already taken three of you and I don't know how I could live with myself if I didn't do all I could to protect you from something like this—something external from you, something that has ultimately to do with me and not you."

"These papers were procured and legitimized by the ESUN's Principal of Peace," Axel murmurs behind the two. "Has this debacle become a federal case? It doesn't meet the parameters for the Peace Wing's involvement and the level of importance is much too sub-par… how, I wonder, could these arrangements have reached the Peace Wing at all?"

"Is that a rhetorical question?" Duo asks.

"Yes, of course it is, Brother," Axel looks at him with more concern than ire. "I'm aware of the nature of your past, just as most of the world is by now, but you can't protect us in this way for the rest of our lives."

"We ain't fuckin' Barbie dolls, Brother," Morty yells out loud, visibly impassioned. "I got a job out there to protect other people. I'm not going to spend a week away from that just because there are a group of psychos want to get back at you for god knows what!"

But Morty is silenced as effectively as Axel is with the unexpected grimness that their comments elicit from Duo.

"This isn't a battle to be won for either of you," Duo says calmly. "The arrangements are made. In fact, it wasn't my decision to begin with."

"So this is a federal thing, then," Axel says.

"No, Axel. At least I hope it won't become one. Now, please, when everyone gets here, just take the basement subway to the safehouse and make no attempts at contact until I give you word."

"Just tell me one thing, Brother,"

"What is it, Morty?"

"Will you fix this?"

Duo pauses and the looks all three share are pained and undeniably dark. "I hope so," He tells them, and they let the silence play out as each organizes his thoughts.

"Alright, then," Morty says with surprising understanding. "I won't fight you anymore, Brother. Just make sure you get back to us alive."

"Marisela has gathered everyone else, including Sonny, so they should be here any moment," Axel says, putting his cell phone back into his pocket. "You should probably prepare, Brother."

"We'll tell them what they need to know,"

Duo smiles gratefully. "Thanks for understanding, guys,"

"No, Brother," Axel says sadly as Duo leaves the room. "Thank _you_."

--

"You want some coffee?" Duo says, swiveling around on his heel to face a masked man he'd hogtied and wound to a chair with barbed wire. The masked man sits there silently, barely even wincing as blood pours from a deep gash hidden by black cotton. Duo sits in a chair directly in front of the man and cocks his head to side to survey further the other's reactions (or lack thereof).

"No? That's too bad," He continues, savoring a lengthy sip. "I make a mean cup of java. It's actually not java, it's "Ethiopian harrar." Supposed to be something of a rare delicacy nowadays; I just found it coasting out in space last month, nicely preserved. It's a shame you're so disinterested in it—after all, it may be your only chance to drink it after I _blow your fuckin' head off_!"

The man remains sitting still, much to Duo's dismay. It worked with Minor, he recalls in disappointment. Duo sighs and leans back into his chair, taking another sip of coffee.

"I'm impressed, man, keepin' your cool in the face of all this violent hubbub," Duo says congenially. "I have to admit, you're better trained than I thought. I didn't think they made men like us anymore. You're a hard man to break, you know that Johann?"

Suddenly, the man before him snaps his head up slightly—not as much movement as Duo would have liked, he muses, but enough to know he'd gotten his point across. Duo leans forward, coming close enough to the other to smell the familiar odor of metal, blood, and sweat and— most of all—fear.

"You get it now, big boy?" Duo hisses, his demeanor changing instantly into something ominous—something undeniably devoid of kindness. "This isn't the Little League you're dealing with, and you'd do the fuckers who sign your paychecks a favor by telling them that—if you're lucky enough, anyway,"

Duo can hear the other's breath quickening, asking him exactly what wants: how much does he know? How much can he do?

"You're not my enemy, Johann, you're just the unfortunate victim of circumstance. I'm not in the mood to throw you aside like the puppet they made you out to be, but I'm not against the idea either.

"It's like this: either you tell me what I need to know, and I'll _maybe _let you walk out that door… or you don't."

Duo sits there, watching intently as the man's breathing labors and hastens and wondering whether it was his words or something else that is making the other man react in such a fashion. The man closes and opens his eyes in what seems to be excruciating pain.

"Stop fucking around and give me an answer!" Duo yells, throwing his scalding cup of coffee into the man's face. Instead of screaming, the man begins to laugh slowly, maniacally, sending Duo reeling back into his seat with an inescapable feeling of vulnerability and unease.

"You selfish fucking bastard," Says the masked man between pained exhalations. "You haven't just killed us both. You're gonna send us back to _hell_,"

The air in the room suddenly stiffens in Duo's body, freezing his joints with clinical precision. The ringing inside his ears becomes loud enough to deafen as he is faced with an unprecedented epiphany. The masked man resumes his laughter, albeit quietly.

"You get it now, big boy?" He says.

All Duo remembers after that is the sting of blood in his eyes as he stared helplessly at the gaping, fleshy maw that was the masked man's chest.

--

"I see," Says Heero, who contemplatively handles some commands at some open windows as Duo finishes relaying the assassination attempt.

"For the moment, Johann's body will be buried where the Graveyard used to be. Fitting, don't you think?"

"Did he say anything to you?"

A pause. "No, Heero, I already told you. He didn't say a word. Before I could even begin a torture ritual, some asshole somewhere blew his fuckin' heart out of his chest."

Another pause. "How long did you spend with him again?"

"He came at 0217, as he'd planned, and he was gone by 0350. Wasn't more than two hours that he and I were at it before the higher-ups understood that he'd already been caught,"

"Strange," Heero says succinctly.

"I know. Did they really think it would be that simple, killing a Gundam pilot?"

"They probably already knew that you'd discover the assassination attempt,"

Duo sits back for a moment and thinks about the odds of such an occurrence. He isn't even sure whether to under or overestimate his enemy, considering that—in all reality—he doesn't know who his true enemy is. What could businessmen possibly have in their arsenal of intelligence that could possibly outsmart him? Hilde can't possibly be a source of information—that's something that he trusts with all his heart. But the possibility that they are, in some way, thinking three to five steps ahead of Duo can't be too high. After all, this is just business, right? Not being a very good businessman in the first place, he isn't about to barter for anything.

_You selfish fucking bastard_, he remembers clearly.

"They are very likely not to stop such attempts, either, paltry as they are," continues Heero, snapping Duo back into the present. "It will be best for you to lay low in a protected facility for the time being to ensure your safety."

"Whoa there, Your Highness. Putting me under house arrest isn't going to help make this go away, you know that. You've already house arrested the rest of the people I care about; you're not about to do that to me, too!"

"I never said house arrest, Duo, I said protected facili—"

"What the hell does that mean? "Protected facility"? This ain't the time for semantics, Heero."

"This is no time for you to be holding back information, as well, but you don't see me try to stop you from doing what you think is right."

This silences Duo for a moment and the tension builds in the space between the two screens. Even being hundreds of thousands of miles away, there exists heaviness between the two that expressed a weight unbeknownst to either of the men—a weight carried and shared and let go in the instant of peace; a weight missed; a weight left unresolved. Neither knows or ever knew what the weight is composed of—only its presence existing in the soft flux that is peace, the antithesis of their lives.

"I have to find Hilde," Duo says, breaking the silence.

"And I'm trying to help, so why don't you just let me?"

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two, Westside Spaceport

Holding a two-hundred-page brief on the Volans Network and all affiliated institutions, Duo steps aboard a shuttle to Earth. As he makes his way through check-in and security, he mulls over the meaning of the foreboding feeling in his stomach. Most of it is in anticipation of the coming days, weeks, and months (hopefully not years) that he will spend tracking down Hilde and taking back the life he'd worked so hard to obtain. But a part of it is a fear that had been dormant until recently, something he thought he had reconciled with after the war.

It isn't that he is ashamed of his strange attraction, as he is, and has been for a while now, a self-proclaimed satyr; it isn't even because he is afraid of rejection. It's just—well, he just isn't ready to lose it all yet.

Staring fondly outside his window at the soft whites, bright blues, and lush greens of the planet not far from where he is, Duo grasps at answers—answers explaining the weight that hangs in the space between him and the unexpected reconnections he will undoubtedly make with yet another part of his past.

In any case, Duo thinks with a smile, he's got a better way with words than I remember.

--

**NOTES**

- Please don't bother asking about how I came up with names and numbers. I just wrote whatever sounded well. Yes. I know. It should have been better researched. Well, I put a little thought into it, of course, but for the most part, it's to set the mood of the kind of world the ESUN is, which is very ordered and catalogued by the central system in the Sanc Kingdom. "E-Cluster" for areas near the English Channel, "A-Cluster" for Asian areas, etc. Hopefully that comes across.

- No, Hylic is not like Hylian, though it's a cute coincidence. It's a word derived from Greek meaning "earthly," or very concerned with materials, which for me translates to "tangible."

- Karluv's name is the Czech version of Charles.

- Bahaha, Principal of Peace. Yeah, I wanted his title to stand out from the usual military jargon I'd otherwise use. I figure this isn't the 21st century, so why not play with it?

- The Peace Wing is located somewhere the Mediterranean can be seen.

- Sonny is, obviously, loosely-based on Santino Corleone from _The Godfather_.

- All passages talking about "weight" are allusions to Milan Kundera's _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_.

- Occam's razor: the simplest solution is usually the best.

- I forgot to mention this, but I live in the Bay Area, and I read the SF Chronicle. So… The Lagrange Chronicle.


	3. Elephant

Chapter Three

Elephant

--

-- Tell me if you want me to lie,  
-- 'Cause this has got to die,  
-- I said, this has got to stop—  
-- I said, this has got to lie down  
-- With someone else on top.  
-- You can both keep me pinned,  
-- 'Cause it's easier to tease—  
-- But you can't make me happy  
-- Quite as good as me.  
-- (Well, you know that's a lie.)

--

A.C. 205 – Sanc Kingdom: Old Eurasia Spaceport

Duo, muddled head and all, is accosted by men in pressed white suits the moment he steps out of the shuttle. He is informed that his luggage has been acquired and will be following him in a separate vehicle, which will then follow them to the premises within the Sanc Kingdom assigned to him by the Principal. The Vice Foreign Minister Peacecraft, they say to him, sends her regards, although she is at the moment indisposed in the A-Clusters (near the South China Sea). This is, of course, too much information for the half-asleep American to receive at the moment. He follows them obediently, wishing for the ordeal involving the Sanc Kingdom to be over though it has barely even began.

As they make their way to the Peace Wing, the guards are contacted by the faint, yet recognizable, voice of Heero on the car-phone. Duo's fatigue fades and is energized by ire and anticipation—a state with which he has recently become reacquainted with. He admires the verdant glow of the savanna that spans the outskirts of the Sanc Kingdom. The sphere's glow from space will never compare to the actual sight of sunlight against a blade of grass, Duo realizes. He uses these thoughts to calm himself but before long finds himself staring into striking dark blue eyes, welcoming him with a fierce elegance that stops Duo's breath.

He steps out, feigning exhaustion with a drawn-out yawn, before he gleefully makes his way to Heero's side. He turns and gives the white-clad bodyguards a sharp salute and a big grin, which they promptly ignore.

"Thanks a lot, boys, but I think I can handle it from here," He says with a mocking authoritative tone. "I can take care of handsome villain all by myself," Duo says as he pantomimes a punch to Heero's shoulder, but the frightened stares of the bodyguards prevent him from following up his intention.

After an awkward moment of silence, one of the guards says, "Sir, shall we accompany you?" They disperse with the slight shake of Heero's head, earning him a look of false awe from Duo.

"What power, Your Highness," Duo says, smiling. "I envy the perks of your glamorous new life."

"Certainly better than yours," Heero responds with a deadpan brusqueness that manages to titillate Duo. Unfortunately, Duo thinks.

"Follow me." Heero leads him through the sparkling golden gates of the Peace Wing, past the grand glass offices Duo visited. They wander and wind about, following a path in the Peace Garden, where the smell of lilac and ocean water hypnotizes Duo to a state of perfect lightness. Just beyond a shrub reincarnation of the Venus de Milo facing Rodin's _The Kiss_ is the breathtaking view of the Mediterranean Sea bathed in wanton reds and supple oranges. Duo didn't want to feel as good as he did this very immaculate moment, given the circumstances that brought him here, but he can feel no other emotion as the wind strikes his lungs and moves through his body.

"This cottage will be your studio," Heero says loudly to snap Duo back into reality. The cottage before him was small, homely, and opaque (save a huge, circular window facing the ocean). Its rusty colors shimmer under the sunset and Duo is strangely gripped with a longing for home. "Everything you need is inside. Don't be fooled by the idyllic nature of the facility; it is as protected as I stated."

"I'm not fooled by it—I'm in love with it!" Duo says happily.

"I thought it would help you calm down and focus on what your next actions will be,"

"Oh, so you built this especially for me?" Duo chides, nudging Heero's shoulder. "How sweet of you, Your Highness."

"No, I didn't," Heero says, stiffly opening the door and leaving Duo outside. Duo follows him with a small frown and slight disappointment. "This is my cabin, which I use to help me deal with difficult cases. I don't like the transparency of the Peace Wing too much; I had this built for my own sanity."

"But your office isn't transparent,"

"A glass house is what it is."

"Have it your way, Cheshire Cat," Duo says, putting down his luggage in the corner. He removes his laptop from within a briefcase and sets it on the white marble table in the middle of the room. "I assume I can have some sort of access here?"

"This cottage is equipped with the Hylic system, too, if you'd prefer to get acquainted with it," Heero says. "You may still access non-ESUN files esoterically but in order to get inside information, you will need to access it via our system."

"I won't need too much more, other than building schematics, if you can allow me access to those."

Heero pauses and looks at Duo expectantly. "What do you need schematics for?"

"Well, I thought it was obvious. I have to infiltrate the Volans meeting with Corvus."

Heero remains silent still, staring at Duo with ever-growing anger. Duo stares back resolutely, saying nothing and everything with his own silence.

"No," Heero states.

Duo narrows his eyes in confusion. "Then why did you bother bringing me here?"

"To save your life," Heero says angrily. "You're not going to find Hilde by acting rashly, Duo,"

A pause. "What the fuck would you know?"

"Nothing," Heero says plainly, "Thanks to you."

"They could kill Hilde tonight for all you know!"

"Hilde could already be dead for all you know,"

Words are stuck in Duo's throat and mind, unable to admit to himself—and more so Heero—the story behind his rationale. Despite the idyllic effect of the Mediterranean portrait around him, Duo feels only regret and unabashed frustration. The only thought running through Duo's mind is that Heero's imprisoned him, despite the promise that he wasn't going to, and that every second he isn't acting, Hilde could be dying.

All because of him, the selfish bastard, Duo thinks. The problem is, he's not entirely sure who he's talking about anymore.

"She's not fucking dead, so stop saying that!" Duo hisses, cheeks tight with blood and fury.

"You don't know anything," Heero says, raising his voice. "And moreover, I don't know anything, which is precisely why we need more time to gather information about the truth behind these attacks on you."

Duo remains angered but silent. Heero proceeds to turn his back on the other man to leave the cottage.

"Tell me when you've found something I can _use_, Duo."

Heero begins to walk away but stops when he hears Duo's movements behind him. He feels Duo's hand around his arm and he is moved to face the other.

"I know it's Volans who's responsible for all this," Duo pleads. "Why won't you just trust me?"

"Because I have no reason to," Heero says. The two share another moment of discomfort before Duo lets go of his arm. He leaves without waiting for a reply.

Duo's breath gets caught in his throat as a familiar pang grips his chest. The further Heero fades into the distance, the more his chest caves into the swell of gravity centered on his heavily beating heart. He tries in vain to clutch the throbbing and hold it still, needing it to stop, needing to think clearly, but he finds that it is futile.

It's always about you, isn't it, Heero, he thinks. Always you.

--

Heero stands with his back to ten white-suited Peace Wing officers, gazing at the violent throes of the high tide eroding the cliffs not too far away. The little rustic cottage is within his line of sight.

"He's gone," Heero says as he turns to face his men with crossed arms.

"Yes, Principal; we can't find him anywhere. We think he's left the premises completely, though we aren't entirely sure how," The guard, Milo, is interrupted by a call in his headset. He looks up to Heero, who waits patiently for the news. "Uh… Sir… it seems that Mr. Maxwell could have very well stolen an Aries Traveler found to be missing this morning."

"Have you located the suit?"

Milo whispers into his headset while the other men grow more fearful of the irritated look developing on Heero's face. "No, sir, it seems Mr. Maxwell was able to remove the tracking chip installed in the suit."

"Very well, gentlemen," Heero says. "We can do no more for Mr. Maxwell. Revisit your stations and reinvestigate the robbery to check for anything else that's missing. Thank you for your time."

The men bow in unison and exit the room quietly, leaving Heero to his thoughts. Truthfully, he doesn't have many at the moment. His thoughts run in one, long strand, consummating in one brief sentence:

Duo Maxwell, you fucking idiot.

--

A.C. 205 – E-Cluster: Unnamed Region

"I know, I know, I'm a fuckin' idiot," Duo says out loud with a heavy sigh, as if he is talking to someone. "Sorry, Heero, but it had to be done. Can't have you fighting my fights for me."

He is in at an altitude high enough not to be distinguished clearly by civilians and low enough to keep the pressure normal for the speed. At 1600, he will have arrived on-schedule at E-Cluster XJ233097, Amsel Baum Cherbourg-Octeville satellite, where a meeting between Leighton Aves Corvus and Keith Marcel is to take place at 0800, giving him just enough time to prepare his attack.

You see, Duo still remains a master at deception when situations call for it. Before his arrival to the Peace Wing, Duo was two steps ahead of Heero's intentions. Having realized the other's motives for aid, Duo deduced early on that containment was Heero's chosen master plan regarding the events on L2. And he also knew that Heero's offer of a protected facility equaled containment. He took advantage of the fact and was able to easily infiltrate the PW database (with the help of an unsuspecting Joe something-or-other who'd left his computer unguarded) long enough to conduct his search in a mere thirty-five seconds—just enough time to go unnoticed.

After succeeding in that aspect of his plan—that is, finding the location of the Marcel-Corvus meeting—he was then just left with his escape, which as you can see, wasn't all that difficult. It wasn't even difficult to procure the weapons he needed. Peace really makes people lazy, Duo thought at the time.

And now he is flying exactly point six point eight miles beyond his ultimate destination, just around the mountainous edge of the prefecture. At 0100, he will make his way to the marina, where the building in question is located. Duo lands without being detected, which he's sure enough is true, and exits the Aries with a determined look severe enough to will a natural disaster to life.

--

A.C. 205 – E-Cluster: Cherbourg-Octeville XJ000000

Duo grunts, soaked in sweat, as he installs the last camera inside the walls of the only conference room in the building-by-the-sea. He rests briefly, noticing for the first time that the ebb and flow of the English Channel cannot be heard inside the building. Pity, Duo thinks, they should all at least have something nice to listen to before they die.

Duo checks his watch and is pleased to find he is on-point with his timing. He has installed forty cameras throughout the building, as well as a massive amount of SASRs (especially the conference room), all wired to his handy laptop. It is now 0640, and Duo decides it is time to move to a safer destination.

Duo moves his operations to a park half a mile away, where he positions himself in a secluded area with a clear view of his line of attack. And hour and twenty-minutes later, on the dot, Duo's guests arrive to the building-by-the-sea one by one, all completely unsuspecting of their fate.

Duo watches them all exit their posh, lacquer-shined limousines and enter the building unaware of his careful observance. First on the list was Marcel himself, accompanied by someone who looked like his secretary, maybe. Duo checks them off his list, pairing each face with a name precisely.

All there, he thinks to himself, except for that strange, small woman, whose face is consistently hidden by her wide-brimmed hat.

Marcel leads them all to the stark-white conference room with no windows. Duo switches cameras and activates the auto-lock he installed earlier. This goes unnoticed by all the attendees, and Marcel proceeds to shake each businessman's hand with a prim smile. Finally, all the men sit down and to listen to Marcel's proposal.

"Welcome, gentlemen," Marcel begins. "I am pleased that you have all come to finalize decisions on our wonderful merger. It will be a great undertaking, the merging of a respected salvaging company and a ship-building savant company such as Amsel Baum, but I ensure you that this merger will result in irrefutably the best partnership the After Colony years will ever see!"

The men laugh heartily at Marcel's bombastic words, playing cordially to his theatricality. Duo, however, is mesmerized by the unmoving, unresponsive big-hat woman (she at least should have the decency to take off that ridiculous hat, Duo thinks).

"As you can see," Marcel continues, once more gaining Duo's attention, "Though Mr. Volans is not here, his personal investment is proven by the presence of his most trusted partner, Miss Liegen, whom I do not doubt you have heard of before, despite her penchant for being a little _too_ inconspicuous. Right, gentlemen?" This elicits a hearty laughter from all the men.

This must be Grizel Liegen, Duo thinks, but I thought it was only a rumor that she was Volans' partner. Records don't have her as an associate, she's not on the payroll, her name has only been present in business minutes for only a few years, and yet she is some kind of presence in the Volans Network.

Duo looks at her, barely even listening to Marcel's pleasantries. If anything, she probably knows more about Volans and his plans than Marcel. Slight change of plans, but still good enough, Duo thinks.

Marcel's introduction ends (earning a "Thank God" from Duo) and the men agree to begin the contract-reading. One of the men excuses himself and asks the others to wait, as he needs to do some "business in the boy's room," but finds the door solidly shut. Duo grins with a trace of mania.

"What the hell is the meaning of this, Marcel!" The businessman shouts, inciting panic within every man in the room. Before the man can get another word out, he is shot several times in several places by several rifles in the ceilings and walls with a tap of Duo's finger.

"Welcome to the jungle," Duo murmurs sinisterly. His blood boils and flushes his cheeks with raw hunger and excitement. He grins, widely; deadly. He is no longer just Duo anymore. The darkness circles in his unforgiving eyes, swims in his salivating mouth, tingles sharply in his fingertips. The first sight of blood painting the conference room walls becomes his opiate.

Tap, tap, tap. Businessman after businessman screams in agony, despair, and insanity as he is ripped apart by merciless bullets flying from every direction. Some die at Duo's command; others fling themselves into Death's arms without his help but due to their complete and utter helplessness. Flesh and blood drips lifelessly from the camera lens as Duo kills the last victim of circumstance, who looks directly into the hidden camera with a look of pure hopelessness. Duo tries to feel sorry but finds that he is unable to do so.

Throughout the whole ordeal, Duo realizes that Grizel Liegen has not moved an inch. She remains sitting still, hat intact though drenched in blood. Keith Marcel lies on the ground, crying and half-screaming in a fetal position, rocking back and forth. Duo enters the next phase of his plan and sets the doors to open in five minutes.

--

"Get a hold of yourself, Keith," Grizel Liegen says, speaking for the first time. She hears the door unlock, seemingly expectant of it. "And get up so we can leave."

Keith Marcel, in a frenzy, looks up at Grizel looming over him. "It's over? Is it over? We can leave? What happened? He's going to kill us? Don't let him kill me, don't kill me!" He cries.

Grizel bends down and grips his arm roughly, pulling him up to his feet. "It's okay, Marcel, it's over. We can go now."

Keith Marcel laughs and laughs as Grizel leads him back out to Port de Cherbourg, where their emergency transportation awaits them. They leave bloody footsteps in their wake, smudging the streets with used-up lives as they scream their voices hoarse in the name of escape. Keith Marcel feels a sense of relief as he watches his beloved black, lacquer-shined car roll up lovingly to his side, to his rescue. In no time at all, Keith Marcel is inside the leather-lined thing of beauty, kissing the windows in utter disbelief of his luck.

That is, until he hears the car lock down suddenly and finds himself staring at the barrel of an antique semi-automatic Smith & Wesson CS45. Grizel, beside him, is unfazed, even though Duo is holding yet another gun at her head.

"You look surprised to see me, Mr. Marcel," Duo says in an affable manner. "On the other hand, you, Miss Liegen, do not look so surprised—which, in turn, surprises me very much,"

Keith Marcel begins to cry, scream, and continue his frenzy, clawing at the doors and at Grizel Liegen, who angrily punches him in an effort to quiet him down.

"I'll tell you anything, _anything_, just please don't kill me like you killed the others! Don't kill me! _I haven't done anything!_" He pleads at Duo.

"Then tell me where Hilde is and why you motherfuckers took her," Duo growls.

"Hilde? Hilde Schbeiker?" Keith Marcel says, dumbfounded, but instantly ecstatic. "That's what you killed them for? That's why I'm here? Oh, thank God, I thought it was something I _did_! Well, that's easy, Mister… what is it? Well, it doesn't matter,"

Duo's heart beats rapidly. Finally, he thinks in relief.

"Hilde Schbeiker is—"

Before Marcel divulges the information that Duo desperately wants, the back windshield is shattered and he is mysteriously shot in the head. Duo's eyes widen in utter despondency as Marcel's smiling, half-delirious face slumps to the side, blood bubbling down from the hole in his head. Grizel Liegen sits still, properly, inhumanly.

Still shell-shocked, Duo barely catches sight of Liegen's hand pressing an unobtrusively-colored button somewhere on the side of her seat. Unable to stop her, Duo turns his head to the sound of the air conditioning turning on and spraying him with an anesthetizing substance that sends him spiraling into unconsciousness.

Duo drops his guns and hears their slow-motion tumble to the bottom of the car. His body numbs and his vision slides comfortably into darkness as he watches as Hilde wipe Marcel's blood from her face.

--

A.C. 205 – The Winner Estate

Quatre walks into the computer room with tea tray in hand, ready for another round of Hilde-hunting. He hands Trowa a cup, who gracefully gives him thanks as he continues reading about the movements of both Amsel Baum and the Volans Network.

"It's like the good old days, isn't it Trowa?" Quatre says, amused. "Back to the old, misguided days of ours."

"Very much so, Quatre," Trowa replies earnestly. "Though I can't help but feel that this is somehow an unwise battle being fought between Duo and these L2 Networks."

"Even so, Trowa," Quatre says, sitting beside him and opening windows of his own, "You could tell even just from his voice that whatever he's fighting for is incredibly meaningful to him,"

"That's true," Trowa says, looking directly at Quatre. "I would do the same for things that are meaningful to me."

Quatre smiles. "What was it that you told me once? That when we were pilots still, you learned that acting on your emotions saved your life? If that's so, then Duo is doing the right thing,"

Trowa reminisces briefly about those words. They hadn't come from him.

"I suppose," Trowa says softly. "I hope we're right."

A loud beeping interrupts their conversation and causes them to drop both their cups in a hurry to see what the system has found.

**WARNING… E-CLUSTER XJ CHERBOURG-OCTEVILLE IN CODE RED… (1) MATCHING PERSONNEL ENTRY TO CLUSTER**

Both Quatre and Trowa know precisely who the entry is. DUO MAXWELL, they read knowingly. They had used the system to list down all the possible locations Duo might attempt to access if and when he decided to indirectly contact the Volans Network or its affiliates. They did this to ensure that they would find him in the advent of new information regarding Hilde's location and, moreover, his safety.

"We should contact Heero," Trowa says quietly.

"Wouldn't Heero already be in contact with Duo?"

"Given this code red in the E-Cluster, Duo must have refused Heero's help," Trowa explains. "Heero wouldn't risk that as Principal."

Quatre nods and summons the system's call function. As the system attempts to contact the Peace Wing, Quatre says with a small laugh to Trowa, "Things have changed a lot since the good old days, haven't they?"

Trowa, smiling inwardly, looks at Quatre with warm sentiment. "Not everything," He murmurs gently.

Their attention is called to Heero's hard, uncompromising presence, which neither of them has experienced personally in nearly a decade. Their glimpses of Heero were reserved to television appearances and glamorized newspaper photographs at the Vice Foreign Minister's side. Seeing him in person, even just electronically, makes both of them feel partly in awe, partly nostalgic.

"Hello, Heero!" Quatre says joyfully. "It's nice to see you again!"

"Good morning, Quatre," Heero says courteously. "And Trowa, as well. To what do I owe this greeting?"

"Have you received the recent reports from the Preventers in the E-Cluster yet?" Trowa says.

Heero shakes his head. "No, I'm just about to get to them. What's happened?"

"There are reports there of some kind of civil unrest. No other news, yet, but some civilians heard loud noises and reported it to the Preventers, who're just getting around to the scene now, but have already labeled it a code red," Quatre explains.

"How did you get hold of this news?" Heero inquires, not hiding his suspicion. Quatre is unsure of how to respond; he looks to Trowa to explain.

"Do you know where Duo is right now?" Trowa asks. He notices the slight change in Heero's bearing.

"We think he might be involved in whatever might have happened there because, you see," Quatre stammers, but Heero picks up from where he leaves off.

"Because that's supposedly where Corvus' men are meeting with Volans' partners, and you think Duo went there to try and force information from them regarding Hilde's whereabouts."

"Yes," Trowa says. "But more importantly, Heero, I think you should know,"

"Know what?" Heero snaps unexpectedly, earning a strange, knowing look from Trowa.

"We believe Duo might also be in danger," Quatre says. "He's sloppy, but he's not so sloppy that he would leave a crime scene unchanged, especially if he was responsible for it."

"Also that Duo would have taken enough precautions to make sure there weren't any survivors,"

There is a long silence before Heero begins to speak again.

"I see," He says. "In that case, I thank you for your punctual report. Your nation thanks you."

Heero nods good-bye and both Quatre and Trowa are left somewhat at a loss for words—or rather, there is nothing more about the subject they can currently say. Everything, even the unfamiliar changes that they notice in Heero, is already spoken for in the weighty silence that followed the phone call. Quatre sighs and moves to clean up the spilled tea and broken porcelain. Trowa opens up a new window and attempts to call Duo, but ends up with nothing but a busy signal.

--

A.C. 205 – Sanc Kingdom: The Peace Wing

Heero sits inside his office, staring at the clinically-white walls of his office reflecting the wading morning sunlight in subtle angles. Yet even this is not able to tranquilize him; his mind is, suitably, elsewhere. Somewhere on the shores of the English Channel, or only God knows where if Quatre and Trowa are right. They were too far away to be able to do anything about it and too distant from the situation to feel any immediacy, any reason to it.

_Why won't you just trust me?_

Heero closes his eyes and breathes deeply. He stands up, dismayed by his inability to find peace while sitting still. He leaves his office and proceeds to the desk, where a perky, attractive secretary happily gossips on the phone. At the sight of Heero's looming figure, Miss Sphinx hastily says good-bye to her best friend and welcomes the Principal with a blinding smile.

"Good morning, Principal Yuy," She chirps cheerily. "How may I be of service to you?"

"Miss Sphinx," He greets her casually, falsely, as he's learned to do with civilians unfamiliar to him. It is a show necessary to a position at ESUN—necessary, because appearances in this world are again necessary to instill peace within each and every civilian watching the ESUN's every move. He is the protector of this peace, its Rock of Gibraltar, its eternal soldier. Yet recent events have made him doubt this _raison d'être._ He knows that there is only one way to reinforce his belief in the meaning of his life, and that is to eliminate the doubt. "I will be departing for an indefinite amount of time. Please inform the General that he is to take my place for the duration of my leave. Also, since the Minister Peacecraft is on vacation, it would be wise not to inform her of this, or of anyone but the General, so as not to incite any confusion or mystery,"

Miss Sphinx, nods agreeably and dials the phone immediately to contact the General. Heero leaves the Peace Wing and arranges use of a semi-terrestrial glider jet, as well as provisional weaponry. He boards the jet and seats himself in the cockpit, arousing memories that lied dormant not too long ago.

"Mission accepted, Duo," He says.

--

**NOTES**

- I use the Venus de Milo and _The Kiss_ to juxtapose their opposing structures; one is complete, entwined and unconcerned with its surroundings while the other is missing parts and is immersed in whatever is in front of her.

- Ah, the beginning of the "glass house" not-so-riddle… don't ask, 'cause it'll be explained in the end.

- Cheshire Cat, Alice in Wonderland.

- An Aries traveler is not really a mobile suit; it's just a random flight mechanism named after the mobile suit that was designed for flying during the war. Imagine it as you will; for me, it looks like those weird glider things in "The Thomas Crown Affair" remake with Pierce Brosnan.

- Cherbourg-Octeville has no significance to me; I picked it because it was in a reasonable location in the English Channel.

- SASRs, Special Applications Scoped Rifle, or in other words, sniper rifles.

- Time is in military terms.

- Why Grizel Liegen? I wanted something super German, so I mashed up Hansel and Gretel. I didn't want Gretzel because, well, sounds like Pretzel. So Grizel it was.

- "Welcome to the jungle." Well. We all know that Duo _must_ be a Guns n' Roses fan. Come on.

- Psst. I'm a pacifist but I like guns.


	4. Rootless Tree

Chapter Four

Rootless Tree

--

-- What I want from this is learn to let go.  
-- (No, not of you—but of all that's been told.)  
-- Killers reinvent and believe;  
-- And this leans on me like a rootless...  
-- Fuck you, and all we've been through.  
-- I said, leave it—it's nothing to you.  
-- And if you hate me, then hate me so good  
-- That you can let me out. (Let me out.  
-- It's hell when you're around.)

--

A.C. 205 – Location Unknown

"Hey you!" Fifteen-year-old Duo yells. "I'm callin' you!" He runs toward the shadowy figure of Heero in the distance. He catches up to the shadow and reaches out, touching only thin air. Duo sighs. "Here I am, Mr. Nice Guy, offerin' to fix your mobile suit with mine, but you just brush me right off…"

The shadow of twenty-five year old Heero appears next to him. "Could you keep it down over there?" Duo turns around and punches him square in the jaw, but the shadow dissipates against his skin. He starts to run towards no particular direction, pulled by something like gravity. The scenery in front of him slides between blinding and crystal-clear, as if he is running in a flickering old roll of film. Heero's shadow appears in the corner of his eye.

"Life is cheap, especially mine," Heero says hauntingly. "I think they like you better… it's a good chance, so don't die yet."

Duo's eyes become wet for no reason. He feels the wind cooling his cheeks as they hit the water falling helplessly from Duo's eyes. The visions of Heero disappear completely as Duo regains complete, yet addled, consciousness. He blinks, eyes poisoned by the fluorescent whiteness all around him. He tries to move but finds that he's strapped tightly to a cold, tilted table. He grunts, throat dry and coarse, and realizes that he is additionally and embarrassingly buck-fucking naked.

Shit, he thinks, I'm in _real_ trouble now.

"Well, well, Mr. Maxwell," Duo hears someone behind him say. "Have a nice nap, did you?"

Duo, rather foreign to the feeling of fear, chuckles hoarsely. "Hell yeah," He whispers, "But I think I also might'a gotten laid. Seein' as how it's just you and me, I'm guessin' you're the one with the bondage fetish."

Duo laughs out loud as best as he can. The man, however, gave a displeased humming sound before walking over to face Duo directly. Duo's eyes widen in raw fury.

"Volans!" He croaks out, desperately struggling to remove himself from the table but to no avail. Duo hears several voices behind him laughing along with Volans, igniting an anger within him that he has long since forgotten he can feel. "You piece of shit coward! What the fuck've you done to Hilde?!"

"If I recall correctly, Mr. Maxwell, it was Hilde who got you into this position in the first place," Volans responds calmly. Duo yells indistinct curses before Volans gags him "for posterity. You are, after all, in a business meeting, Mr. Maxwell. Do mind your manners."

Volans turns him around and has him face the other leaders of the L2 salvaging networks: Sirius Canis Major, Leonardo Canes Venatici, Caelus Orion, and, of course, the motherfucker Karluv Volans. Duo stares at them in utter disbelief.

"We're sorry, Maxwell, but your extermination is in the interest of all our businesses," says the wiry, olive-skinned Leonardo Canes Venatici.

"Your business is getting out of hand. The salvaging business has now become a monopoly under you," Sirius Canis Major states. "Prosperity must be shared, not owned by one entity. I'm sorry to say that you have reaped all the benefits and have left us, your former colleagues, with nothing. And that is unjust."

What the fuck are you talking about, Duo screams with his eyes. You assholes are the ones with all the money!

"It would just be better for you, as well," Caelus Orion says. "When you find that you have nothing left to go back to on L2."

Those words spark something beyond anger in Duo. In fact, the anger is quelled by that alien emotion that he swore he'd never let himself feel again. Volans asks the other men to leave them alone briefly before they continued the execution. He calls on a guard at the room's only door to lead the other men into the waiting room. Volans then turns his attention back to Duo.

"You see, Maxwell," Volans says quietly, putting his face directly next to Duo's. "It's over. Everything you own—everything you love—has left you. It's gone. Poof. All because you decided to steal something very, very important from me."

Duo's eyes and teeth clench together almost hard enough to draw blood on muscle action alone when he feels Volans' hand slowly caressing his chest, then his stomach. Duo inhales and exhales sharply, trying in vain not to react the Volans' prying hands as they proceeded to viciously molest Duo's genitals.

"It's just business, Maxwell," Volans whispers in to his ear breathlessly, chuckling with grunt his pumping hands draws from the helpless younger man. "You take something from me, and I take it back… with interest." Volans laughs into his ear.

Duo feels nothing but sickness, an ill feeling enough for him to wish death on himself. Volans removes his gag but does not stop his sexual prodding of Duo's body. He cries out when he feels something warm and foreign enter an area never meant to be entered by foreign objects. Volans laughs and watches and tears of desperation force themselves out of Duo's eyes.

"I wonder at all why you even bothered to steal it. After all, what could you be thinking of doing with it? Trying to recover the past? You miss the limelight, Maxwell, the feeling of power, of having control over the lives of normal people?" Volans laughs. "Pathetic. All you pilots are pathetic. Just a bunch of megalomaniacal cowards."

But now that I've succeeded in taking everything that is precious to you, I would like my reward back, Mr. Maxwell."

Duo heaves and spits a glob of saliva straight into Volans' eyes, sending him stumbling backwards in disgust. Duo laughs, albeit pained as all hell.

"Fuck you," He says tersely. "It doesn't belong to you and now it never will."

Volans, wiping his face in complete repulsion, sprints to the door in the corner. He calls out an indistinct name and points back to Duo. "Take his precious jewels and throw 'em in the trash. And make sure he _feels_ it."

The surgeon nods and enters the room. Duo's body is wrought with anguish as the surgeon brings the scalpel toward his genitals. Duo pleads more audibly than he has ever remembered speaking, screaming prayers and curses in the same breath. The surgeon remains unaffected and inches the blade closer and closer, commencing its incision into Duo's supple flesh.

Duo's first unbearable scream is masked by a gigantic explosion which blows a chunk of glass straight through the surgeon's abdomen, missing Duo only by centimeters. The table topples to the side. Duo frantically attempts to free himself, but the steel binds around his wrists prevent him still. He feels a sharp pain in his side and feels himself falling back into a state of unconsciousness.

He hears the wailing alarms sound all around him as he lies on the floor. He watches as the Volans points the other network leaders to the direction of a shuttle ready to take off. He screams to his guards, "What the fuck just happened? Where the hell are the rest of the men?"

"We don't know, sir," the guard says, frenzied. "When I went to the quarters and all the entrances, every man had been gunned down, but we don't know by who,"

"Shit!" Volans screams. "Get the hell out of here! And tell that bitch to get out of here, too!"

"Roger!" Says the guard as he runs out of Duo's field of vision. Duo watches Volans ignore him and runs to the shuttle's direction in order to escape. Duo finds that it is getting harder to breathe the longer he remains where he is, wherever he is. His mind knows it must panic, but it is unable to function beyond the thick smell of gunpowder, propane, and the faint smell of blood.

Just as darkness consumes him again, he sees the familiar and comforting shadow of Heero Yuy coming to his side, to save him.

"…Don't die yet," He hears, or imagines hearing from Heero.

Now this is a nice last dream, Duo thinks as the curtains to his consciousness close once more.

--

A.C. 205 – T-Cluster – Unknown Residence

Duo awakens feeling damp and warm all over. Am I dead? He wonders, hoping to see the pearly gates when he opens his eyes. But when he sees an imitation of Edward Hopper's "Nighthawks" hanging from the burgundy wall in front of him, he recognizes that he isn't in heaven; he's either at an art gallery, or somewhere far from Volans. Close enough, he thinks, but how?

"Don't move too much," says Heero Yuy, sitting beside him with a lengthy report in his hands. Heero resumes his reading and Duo sits there, trying to think of something to say but he can't find the words. There are too many and too little, and he knows that neither he nor Heero are in any mood to grapple with the questions that would surface.

In typical Duo fashion, though, he attempts to move himself into a more comfortable sitting position, so as not to feel so weak, but finds he has neither the strength nor the pain tolerance to be able to do so. He shouts in pain and slumps back into position, reflexively grabbing the part of his body in immense pain.

Heero puts his report down and moves Duo's blanket off of him. Duo notices he is half-naked, with only a pair of loose flannel pajama pants and a massive patchwork of bandages and gauze around his stomach separating him and Heero. Well, including Heero's own ensemble consisting of a crisp black dress shirt and a pair of fitted dark denim jeans.

"Are you deaf?" Heero asks, but Duo can't tell whether he's being sarcastic or serious. "I told you not to move. I'm not sure what they cut you with, but it was deep enough to cause you to hemorrhage very quickly. You've lost a lot of blood and if I hadn't gotten there in time, you likely would have died,"

Duo looks at him with an ached expression, finding it better to remain soundless. He should have just died, Duo thinks, maybe the network leaders were right. He turns away from Heero. He sees Grizel's face continuously fade in-out with Hilde's, and vaguely remembers that Volans had claimed she was responsible for trapping Duo so effectively. Great, Duo thinks, feeling unbearable pangs of pain not only from his side, but a result of his ribcage closing in on his heart.

Heero stares at Duo's profile, his irritation with Duo's action betraying his overall concern.

"You idiot," He says, watching Duo's countenance stiffen at his words. They remain quiet.

"Fuck you," Duo replies roughly. He feels Heero's hands approach him and he weakly bats them away. Heero forcibly, but gently, takes Duo's hands and places them away from his stomach. These movements cause Duo to protest, but in his condition, he knows it is a losing battle. He sighs heavily and complies to Heero's advances.

Heero begins to unwrap the blood-soaked bandages from Duo's stomach. Duo sees that he has a fresh set of bandages and a bowl of steaming water in a mobile tray next to the bed. Duo turns red from both pain and anger and remains staring rigidly at "Nighthawks" in an effort to ignore Heero. Heero methodically changes Duo's bandages, managing to cause the other as little pain as possible with his precision.

Once Heero is finished, he gets up and picks up the report from Duo's end table. He sits down on the chair beside Duo's bed and resumes his reading. Duo feigns sleep as Heero reads the entire report for nearly two hours (and, by the way, gets no sleep at all—just more and more frustrated for various reasons). Duo peeks at Heero out of one eye; the other man doesn't respond. Once Heero finishes the report, he puts it down on the end table again and looks directly at the peeking Duo.

"As you've probably guessed, I'm going to be watching over you from now until this thing is over," Heero states.

"No, you fuckin' are not," Duo says loudly, almost yelling, despite the dryness in his throat. "This is none of your business. All you need to do is get back to your grand fuckin' job as Relena's bodyguard and just leave me alone!"

"Do you want to find out why all this is happening or not, Duo?"

Duo gazes at him, enraged. "I don't need you," He seethes.

"Yes, you do," Heero says. "And I need to keep this problem from touching the Peace Wing at all costs. So stop whining already, because this time, you aren't going to stupidly risk your life again."

"Look who's fuckin' talkin'," Duo says, amused and angry at the same time. "Mr. I'll-Blow-Myself-Up-Anytime-I-Fuckin'-Want."

"Things change," Heero says.

"No, they don't, Your Highness," Duo replies. "Nothing changes. People, most of all, don't change. Ever."

Heero gives a quiet "hmm" before he gets up and heads for the door. He turns around to find Duo looking outside the window. "I'm going to make tomato soup for lunch. I'll be back soon." Duo doesn't pay attention.

"By the way, Duo, I believe the correct expression is, 'Thank you,'" Heero says as he closes the door.

--

A month has passed by, and Duo has reluctantly come to terms with Heero's presence in his daily life. He contemplatively sips his soup, preferring most times to be quiet around Heero (who is always with book in hand). He is almost always trying to suppress himself from getting too excited at the sight of the other, a feat that proved to become more difficult as the season began to fade into summer. Temperatures increased enough to encourage Heero to wear less stifling clothing. It will be impossible to keep down, Duo thinks sadly, if Heero starts wearing his old attire consisting of the loose green wife-beater and the spandex. Duo closes his eyes and sighs in mock anguish.

"Is there something wrong with the soup?" Heero asks, inserting a bookmark to save his place in Milan Kundera's _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_. Duo opens his eyes and shakes his head.

"No, no, it's great, as usual," Duo says happily. "Broccoli and cheese, my favorite Wednesday treat."

Heero doesn't respond, but instead leaves and wheels in the bandage tray. Duo frowns. He hates getting his bandages changed because Heero also takes the liberty of sponging him down at the same time ("Saves time," Heero would say). It is the time of day he despised most because it is nearly impossible to stop himself from, say, thinking of anything but sex. And that, in turn, makes it impossibly difficult to keep the lion tamed, as they say in the old country.

Duo remembers the one time it did happen was when he was half-asleep, and Heero had begun changing his bandages. Heero didn't seem to notice much—the only reaction he had was when Duo began subconsciously moaning, and Heero shook him awake to ask him if he was in pain. Duo awoke to Heero, his naked body, his throbbing erection, and Heero's hand with a sponge right next to it—sending him in to shock.

"What the fuck are you doing!" Duo screamed as he attempted to pull the blanket over himself but instead doubles over in intense pain. "Fuck, fuck fuck! Owww!" Heero hurriedly set Duo back into his old position and held him down until the pain set aside.

"I'm just cleaning you, Duo," Heero said. "I thought it would be better if you were asleep so you wouldn't feel the pain as strongly."

"Don't touch me when I'm sleeping," Duo hissed, breathing heavily in pain. Heero nodded understandingly and picked up the sponge from the floor. He sat down and began to wrap Duo in bandages once more. Duo felt regret, embarrassment, and a swell of increased attraction to the man bandaging his wounds. Why you, Duo asks, Why does it always have to be you?

"You know, Duo," Heero said quietly, "It's no crime to be grateful,"

Duo frowned, but Heero didn't notice. Why is it so hard for me to say thanks? Duo asked himself. However hesitantly, though, Duo managed to croak out, "Thanks."

Heero finished, took his book, and went to the door. "You're welcome, Duo." Then he left.

"Thank you, Your Highness," Duo says, this time cheerfully. Heero wheels out the tray, closes the door, and returns with a folder thick with papers, which he hands over to Duo.

"Here is the Preventers' report on your botched mission in Cherbourg-Octeville," Heero says, "Along with that mission, you not only caused an uproar among civilians about a new terrorist organization, but you've gotten the attention of the Peace Wing. I don't know how long I can keep this down, but you can't do something like this again, Duo."

Shit, Duo thinks. If that's the case, then Axel and the others…

Duo flips through the report, ignoring Heero's words and focusing only on finding news about occurrences in L2. He needs to know if the others are safe, and by sifting through the papers, he assuages himself. Finding nothing on any underground facilities, Duo sighs in relief.

"That's not good news, Duo," Heero says. "Those are the markings of war."

Duo turns to Heero and smiles wanly. "Sorry, I'm a little sleepy," Duo says, falsely congenial. "You know how I get after eating. I just need some time to nap and then I'll read through this and we'll talk it over, you know, whatever we need to do next,"

"You won't be doing anything," Heero says. "Not in your condition and also because you're an idiot."

Duo laughs it off, eager to get Heero out of the room. "Alright, already. Just lemme sleep, won't you?"

Heero leaves the room and Duo closes his eyes. Heero's absence left a similar cavity in somewhere in Duo. No matter what he does or how long Heero stays, Duo can't ignore the weight of the air that clings to him, pulling him down, whenever Heero is around. It weighs on his heart, having to always cover his marks, his self, around the other. Nothing between them, Duo's convinced, can ever be sincere like this—and therefore the weight will never ease. And if he isn't around, when there's nothing tying Duo down, everything turns into emptiness.

Better emptiness than weight, Duo thinks. Sorry, Heero.

--

When Heero arrived early in the morning to check on Duo, he found all ten of his guards incapacitated in the lobby of the building. He runs over to the group of men and grabs someone half-conscious.

"Where is he?" He says with noticeable anxiety, shaking the guard into lucidity.

"He's gone, sir," mumbles the guard. "Told us to tell you… don't follow… none of your… business…"

Heero drops the guard and sprints back to his vehicle, driving rapidly towards the Tunis Spaceport. He instructs the call-function to dial the number of the Peace Wing.

"Good morning, Principal Yuy, how may I assist you?" Greets Miss Sphinx.

"I need you to schedule a flight from Tunis Spaceport to L2 now," Orders Heero.

"Done and done sir; have a nice flight!"

As the call-function ceases to resound in the car, Heero's mind races to Duo—Duo's whereabouts, Duo's health, Duo's stupidity, Duo's actions. There is something missing, Heero understands, there is something important that Duo hasn't told him. There is something driving Duo to act irresponsibly with his life, motions that are not alien to Heero. If this had been ten years ago, Heero would not have cared what Duo did with his life. He's acting on his emotions—the only way to live a good life—isn't that right?

And then he realizes, somewhat vaguely, that there is something driving him to this mission regarding Duo.

You fucking idiot, He thinks. What the hell do you want?

But Heero no longer knows who he is talking about.

--

A.C. 205 – Shuttle 660 to L2

Duo dreams of Hilde's smiling face and recovers memories of their first excursions out into space as salvagers. He remembers only good times, never bad ones, because he remembers they never had any. He remembers sharing the dark days after the deaths of their employees and the quick spiraling of this life into despondence, into pain—pain that seizes his body and soul when he recalls the moment he realized Hilde was, indeed, Grizel Liegen.

He spasms into consciousness in his seat on the shuttle, cold sweat running down his cheeks.

Why, Hilde? You can't possibly be on his side, thinks Duo, it's impossible. Hilde isn' that kind of person. He must be holding her prisoner. I still have to save her, he thinks desperately, I have to. I have to find out why.

--

A.C. 205 – The Graveyard: Underground Safehouse

"Bro! You're alive!" Sonny screams, running towards him and embracing him tightly. Duo yells in pain, pushing Sonny away and falling to his knees. "Shit!"

Axel pushes Sonny back and Morty comes to Duo's side, lifting him up. Jion helps Morty move Duo to the couch. All of Duo's employees stare at him in shock at his current state, unable to speak.

"What happened, Brother?" Axel says, soothingly stroking his back. Duo laughs in an attempt to calm them.

"It's okay, I'm alive, that's all that matters," Duo says breathlessly. "Listen, guys, I'm really sorry about all this… I really didn't mean for things to go this far, but I'm afraid things on L2 aren't safe for the Maxwell Network anymore. And I'm not entirely sure how else I'll be able to keep you safe unless I keep you here."

"No, Brother, we're fine here," Marisela says assuredly. "All this time we've just been worrying about you,"

"And we were right to worry," Sonny growls. "You look like you're already dead."

"Well, thanks a lot for the compliments, Sonny," Duo chuckles, "Y'douchebage."

"Hey, no problem, Bro," Sonny says, sitting next to him and pushing Axel away. "So are ya gonna be stayin' with us for a while, or what?"

"No," Duo says forlornly. "I just came here to hand the business over to you guys, if and when I become too incapacitated to take care of it,"

"Brother, what the hell are you saying?" Jion asks, exasperated.

"Please, Jion," Duo says weakly. "Please, _everyone_. Don't argue. Don't ask me questions. I'll answer everything when this is over… and if I can't, either way, everything will be explained," Duo hands Axel a key.

"That's the key to the originals of all the business files in my apartment. There's a plan there written by Hilde and me that outlines the necessary renovations to the Graveyard and some new ships we were looking to buy. Also, the floorplans for the office are in there, so the contractors will be able to rebuild it."

"I don't know what all this means, Brother, and I hope to God you know what you're doing," Marisela sighs, "But I'm going to trust that all this is for the best."

They have a moment of silence for what has happened, what will happen. Duo looks at each and every one of his employees—no, his family members—and prays as much as a sinner can pray that he will be able to save them.

I won't stop, Duo thinks, I can't. Not even for you.

--

**NOTES**

- The dream sequence in the very beginning is composed entirely of dialogue from the series (the dubbed version, of course).

- If you really wanted to know, it was Volans' hand/fingers.

- I know it's trendy to like "Nighthawks," but it's a great piece of art for a reason. It's America's "Starry Night." Edward Hopper is the shieeeet.

- Umm… I love _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_. So would Heero.

- "T-Cluster" Area around Tunisia.


	5. Dogs

Chapter Five

Dogs

--

-- He lives in a little house  
-- On the side of a little hill  
-- Picks the litter from the ground  
-- Litter little brother spills  
-- He gives, I get  
-- Without giving anything to me  
-- And the dogs, they run  
-- In the good, good-morning sun

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two: Southside

Despite concerned arguments from his family underground, Duo convinces them that it is better that he stay away from them, at least for now—'til everything blows over. Duo smiles and commits the memory of their bittersweet farewells in his mind as he makes his way through the Southside of L2. Here, the alleys become the streets, and the streets are littered with bodies and garbage—not that you can tell them apart too easily. The stench drives even the animals away, except for the rats, flies, and decrepit hounds sniffing bodies to check if they're alive or food. Crumbling buildings, gun shots, and indistinct human voices meld together to become the Southside's anthem: disjointed, frightening, and musical. To a former street rat, anyway.

But the longer Duo strengthens his composure so as not to look vulnerable, the faster the pain takes a toll on his body. The closer he gets to his destination, the fainter he feels. Luckily for him, the dingy wooden sign saying "Howard's Fun Room" is the next building from where he's standing. He can already feel the seedy, alcoholic air seeping out like chloroform. Chuckling, he strides in with his typical grin.

"Duo Maxwell!" Yells an old man in a hideous pink and green shirt. Duo waves back, not as energetically as he would have liked, but happily nonetheless. "Well, come on in, buddy, have a seat!"

Duo walks over to the nearest table, glad as hell. He surveys Howard as he moves slowly around the bar. Age has caught up to his former Sweeper friend since he last saw him five years ago (when the Sweeper Group decided to part ways and leave all the business to Duo and Hilde, he figured it was the right time to start pursuing other lazy dreams, like opening the "Fun Room"). The old man hobbles over, sprightly but noticeably aged. The wrinkles on his face are more prominent than Duo'd ever remembered, and the trademark tufts of hair on the side of his head, and even the facial hair, has dimmed in color.

Howard's laugh eases Duo as the old man seats himself across the table from the other. He smells of alcohol and forgotten eras.

"Well, well, never thought I'd ever see you come down here," Howard says with a laugh. "Things ain't goin' so well in the business world, nowadays, eh?"

Duo nods, smiles, and sighs at the old man, understanding his strange form of man-comfort. "Well, whattaya gonna do when the whole world's after you, Howard?" Duo jokes back.

"To what do I owe this honor, Maxwell?" Howard says, mumbling thanks to one of his bartenders as they put down two pints of beer on their table.

"I need a favor, Howard," Duo says.

"No, boy, what _you_ need is a vacation. You look like shit," Howard jests. "It would do you some good to stay around here a while. Away from all the fuckers tryin'a kill you, and all,"

Duo grins widely. "What're you, a mind reader, now?"

"Nah," Says Howard, taking a gulp of beer. "You're a smart kid; I knew you'd wise up and ask me for help. Those whatchamacall 'em network bastards can't touch you when you're with me,"

"I'm glad to hear it, Howard," Duo says with a heavy sigh. "Things just aren't going as planned nowadays."

"You know how the saying goes, eh?" Howard says. "'The best laid schemes o' mice an' men gang aft agley.'"

"I think you're already drunk," Duo laughs.

"Makes sense to me," He says. "Now let's drink up, catch up, and get you on your way to the squatters, where you'll be plenty safe."

"Amen to that!" Duo says, wincing inwardly as he raised his glass to Howard's.

--

Three hours later, Duo stumbles out of Howard's bar. "Don't forget—just tell 'em my name!" Howard shouts to him.

"Gotcha, boss!" Duo yells back with a big grin. Seeing old friends always makes Duo smile for some reason; he reckons it's just nostalgia.

As Duo reaches the boundary of the L2 squatters, he exhales in relief. His stomach is wracked with an insufferable throbbing, despite all the progress he'd physically made. He isn't used to walking so much after his incapacitation, too.

When Duo steps on the invisible barrier between L2 and the squatters, a group of young, haggardly-dressed boys half his age come out of nowhere with weapons in their grubby little hands. Duo's face falls.

"There's a God, my ass," He mumbles, preparing himself for an unpredicted fight. He should have known it would be difficult to get through a place like the squatters, though Howard made it sound like it was easy like sunday morning.

The first punk leaps at Duo, which he manages to dodge pretty easily. He shakes his head as the kid pummels into a shack, bringing down the meager building with him. Another one jumps from a garbage bin, baseball bat handy. He runs and swings the bat directly at Duo's face; Duo ducks reflexively, swinging his leg out and knocking the kid down. Duo kicks his bat away and the kid freezes when he sees the coldness in Duo's eyes.

The kid prepares to run away, but he sees the pain flash briefly across Duo's face. He notices that Duo is wounded, somewhere, and gives him a sinister look. "Bastard's got an owwie, boys," He yells, running back towards his gang. "Gang up on him! He won't be able to take all of us!"

Duo squares his feet and glowers, baring his teeth. Suddenly, his vision blurs, and his shoulder slumps to the side. He hears one of the kids shout "Go!" but in the split second it takes him to recover his senses, they are already before him. He flings away the most threatening weaponry they held but is unable to fend off their simultaneous kicks and punches. As soon as he feels the heavy leather catch his stomach, Duo's world goes spinning.

Shit, he thinks, not again, not now. He closes his eyes and prepares for another excruciating jab to his wound, as they likely would have realized by now that that's where he was hurt, but he feels the cold wind hit his neck. He hears one kid call out "Retreat!" Duo looks up and sees three kids lying prostrate on the ground, unconscious, and Heero Yuy towering over them.

Heero turns around with a look of raw condescension and bends down to face Duo. Duo, however, can't face him. Heero props Duo on one shoulder and approaches the group of rebels.

"We're with Howard," Heero says loudly, for the kids and all the others hiding in the shacks to hear. The kids then immediately drop their battle stances and begin to laugh understandingly.

"No fuckin' wonder he's so good," one of them says before they all disappear back into the shanties.

Duo and Heero walk in silence. When they reach the intersection, Heero asks Duo for directions and Duo tells him to head further south until they reach a grey building with an "H" scrawled into the ground. Heero nods. These are the only words spoken between them before they reach the building.

As soon as they reach the room at the top of the stairs, Duo removes himself from Heero's grip and proceeds to sit on the couch furthest away from Heero. Heero observes him reticently for hours.

--

A.C. 205 – The Volans Estate

"I'm gonna kill the fucker that did this to me!" Yells Karluv Volans, slamming his fist into the wall opposite him and creating a dent. His flaccid face is blanched with rage. There is a large gash on the side of his face, a casualty from the attack at the torture chamber. "The other networks think I purposely led an attack on them, and now they're all out to get me!"

Hilde sits in an armchair across the small office from Volans. Her arms are crossed; she is wearing shaded glasses though they are indoors. She sits there stoically until he finishes his tirade.

"Calm down, Karluv," She says sternly.

"Calm down?" Volans fumes, facing her incredulous and outraged. "Who the hell do you think you're talkin' to, you little bitch? You probably had this planned all along!"

Hilde places her arms on the chair and shakes her head at the man. "Quit being dramatic, Volans. I'm here. I haven't tried to stop you from doing anything. You have no reason to question me. You'd do better, however, if you shut up and listen to me."

Hilde can feel what Volans is thinking. It is a simple feeling. He feels threatened by her placid audacity, but Hilde can care less. She needs him to calm down. He seats himself in his desk, sinking into a state of despair and wrath.

"Good," Hilde continues. "Now we can talk."

"What's there left to talk about?" Volans says gruffly. "Maxwell's free again. He'll come after us for sure."

"Duo was severely wounded, if you didn't notice. I doubt he'll recover so soon. He is probably still convalescing somewhere. All we need to do is find him," Hilde approaches Volans' desk and procures a folder from inside her wide purse. She places it in front of Volans. He opens it reluctantly. "You see, Karluv, the game has only just begun."

"What does all this mean?"

"Those are all the possible places Duo Maxwell may attempt to seek shelter, and those are all the people currently linked to him. Kill the rest to make a point. Get your men to each and every one of those places and I guarantee you, we _will_ find him sooner than you think. And once you do," Hilde purposely trails off to let Volans finish.

"We give him an offer he can't possibly refuse," Finishes Volans, wholly pleased.

"Exactly," Hilde says with a small grimace. "Now make those phone calls."

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two Squatters: Howard's Place

Morning arrives before Duo speaks the first word.

"How'd you find me?" He asks quietly.

"A glass house is what it is," Heero answers vaguely. Silence looms over the two of them once more. Duo begins to stand up to walk over to Heero, but Heero quickly moves to catch Duo as he inevitably stumbles.

"Just stay where you are," Heero says in such a gentle manner that it hurts Duo to hear him say it. Duo looks him in the eyes for a very long time, keeping hold of Heero's arm though he is already lying down. After a minute has passed, Duo looks away once more.

"…Thank you," He murmurs. He'd meant to say it only in his head, but it escaped his lips the moment he felt the other try to position him better. Heero doesn't reply; instead, he leaves Duo's side and stands by the window.

After a while, Heero says, "Is there a bathroom here?"

"Yeah, it should be downstairs to your left," Duo yawns. "Why, you need a shower just being here or what?" Unfortunately, the very thought of that begins to stir unwanted reactions from Duo's body. Heero leaves the room without saying a word.

Duo touches his stomach and looks downwards to find that his shirt is thoroughly soaked in blood (thank God it's black, he remarks). He lifts it to find that the bandages are already crusted over with dried bodily fluids. The kick to his stomach had done his wound's progress a great disservice, and now it will take even longer to get completely well again.

It is definitely an unwise time to be wounded, and Duo knows this. He knows that Volans is probably seeking to get revenge on him still, and there is probably nowhere but here in the squatters that Duo can feel safe.

I don't know how much longer I can take any of this, he thinks, it's too much. The closer he gets to the truth, the further he realizes he is from it. On top of that, there's a burden on his soul and mind that he keeps and he isn't exactly sure why he doesn't just surrender to the powers-that-be, who seem so intent in bringing him down. _Things fall apart; the center cannot hold_. He's left to pick up the pieces of his shattered life, and he's desperate to put them back together for just a little bit of sanity. Just to be back where he and Hilde and his brothers and sisters are happy again with the Graveyard. Yet no matter how hard he wishes—how hard he _prays_—there's no escaping the nature of his life. And he fears if he doesn't give it everything he's got, he'll never get away from his name. From the future he once thought was the only one he'd lead.

Heero returns with a roll of gauze, electrical tape, towels, and a bucket of hot water. Duo gazes in no particular direction, lost in thought. Heero puts the items down beside him and draws a chair close to Duo. Duo regards him with genuine astonishment this time. Heero reaches over to lift Duo's shirt, but Duo's hand closes over his, forcing Heero to look at him.

"Why are you doing this, Heero?" Duo asks. Heero takes his hand back and remains quiet while thinking of an answer.

"Because I'm waiting for you," Heero says, "To tell me the truth."

Duo chuckles lightly at this reply, lifting his arms away from his body to give Heero easier access. "I'm a glass house, Heero," He responds ironically. "What you see is what you get. I'm not hiding anything meaningful from you."

"That's not what it means," Heero replies. He begins to remove Duo's bandages and Duo mumbles a "hmm" and stays quiet for the duration of the cleaning.

When Heero takes out the sponge from the bucket, Duo hastily sits upright. "I think I'm okay to take baths now, Heero," Duo says rather quickly. Heero shrugs and puts the sponge back and walks over to the window. Duo walks out the door and to the bathroom, narrowly escaping, once again, another awkward sponging session.

--

While in the bath, Duo reminisces about his days as the Principal's partner. He recalls his feelings for the other man as being platonic, but only because he knew better than to learn to love again. Quatre could love, and Trowa seemed to still have it in him to care. But back then, he was sure that Heero felt just the same about life as he had: that it was meaningless without the mission—that ever-present external mission that prompted his every action since the Tragedy. The only difference between them was that Duo hadn't always thought that way, so there was a reserve of hope still lurking inside him—or so he thought. Recent events have caused to doubt that he ever really had any hope that his life would change for the better, permanently; yet here was Heero Yuy, the silent Evel Knievel, the eternal soldier, with more hope in those blue, blue eyes than Duo felt he had in his entire body. Duo dips his head in the water. Those blue, blue eyes, he thinks.

_I hate it when he looks at me and yet he's always there, always looking even when he's not. He's got eyes on the back of his head, watching my every movement, waiting for me to fuck up over and over again. Why he even gives a crap why I live or die is now beyond me, because the reason behind it is nowhere near any reason I could give him for doing what I've done. For doing what I'm doing. There's an ocean of things I can't say, every drop important, but it doesn't matter._

And that's just it: it doesn't matter, Duo thinks miserably.

--

Duo returns to the room, more nimble and refreshed after his bath. His hair in tangles cascades down around his back and shoulders, dripping still with water. Heero looks at him briefly before resuming his guard near the window.

"Hey, Heero," Duo says, approaching the other. He shakes his head and proceeds to wet Heero's shirt, earning him a slightly annoyed look. Heero stands there merely looking at him, waiting for him to continue. "Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to get you wet.

"Anyway, Heero, I need to get out for a while. If I keep holing myself up, I'll keep being miserable, and I'll never be able to think straight. There's too much going on in my head—what with Volans, and Hilde, and this stupid scratch…" And you, he continues in his head. "I'm gonna go to the bar across the street."

Heero maintains his questioning look. "By that," Duo explains slowly. "I mean, do you want to come with me?"

"It's dangerous for you to be off-guard." Says Heero. Duo rolls his eyes.

"What more can they do to me, Heero?" Duo says. "Besides, you hit them pretty hard. They're not like me, you know, they're like you—they won't act so stupidly all the time. They're probably taking their sweet time planning an elaborate scheme to get me back into some kind of torture chamber. Whatever the case, if I'm gonna die sometime soon, I'm not about to spend it trapped in this prison."

Heero looks at him, strangely affected in an indescribable way by what Duo'd said. "Sorry," Duo mumbles. "I'm not saying it's not nice being with you all the time and all, it's just that—"

"Fine," Heero agrees suddenly. "I'll go."

"Really?" Duo says, sounding excited when in fact he is dreading Heero's company, especially in a place like a bar. "Cool. Okay then. We'll go at night." Duo walks over to his couch, across the room from where Heero stands, and dries his hair methodically. Until the sun sets, neither of the two says a word.

--

_This is your chance, Duo Maxwell. Don't waste it._

Duo tells himself this over and over as he walks briskly with Heero toward the cacophonic sounds ebbing from the bar with no name. Heero trails behind him, looking in both directions for anything suspicious. In the squatters, however, suspicion is the native theme.

The moment they step into the bar is the moment everything between the two men seemed to change. Duo's eyes lit up with some emotion Heero has never seen in a man before, and he is feeling for the first time in a long time the discomfort of being in public. He was born a nameless soldier and then, in no time, became renowned. There was no middle ground for Heero Yuy—no normalcy, no diurnal tasks, no bars, no parties, and no childhood. However, he never cared much for such things, and he finds he still doesn't. He just needs to keep his eye on Duo and perhaps getting him drunk is a good way to get the truth out of him (one of the many reasons Heero himself never drinks).

Duo leaves Heero to his own devices, but from the corner of his eye he knows Heero has seated himself at the bar and is carefully observing him. Duo, for tonight, has let his hair loose. Every man and woman in the bar watches him in awe, because he is by far the most striking and beautiful thing they have ever seen. The bar is a hideout for terrorists, robbers, assassins, and even just some normal civilians who are just born into the unfortunate circumstance of poverty. These are the people Duo grew up with, and he still feels somewhat that he shares something with even the dirtiest, smelliest criminal in the room.

After all, he's no angel, either.

As he dances suggestively with a random beautiful prostitute and drinks from a bottle of hard liquor someone had given him, somewhere in the bar's corner, his eyes are drawn to a pair of piercing greens not more than five feet away. He is an attractive man of no more than thirty years of age, with long brown hair tied back and a clean black shirt (like the kind Heero wears). The man's stare beckons him. Duo takes a long swig from the bottle in his hand, finishing it cleanly, and sets it down before strolling casually over to the brunette of interest.

"What's a pretty thing like you doing in a place like this?" Says the green-eyed man, whose throaty voice sounds eerily like someone else.

The man pushes a shot of tequila towards Duo, who gladly takes it all in one gulp. He's already drunk, having finished that bottle of god-knows-what, and the added shot of tequila, and the next one that he orders, is likely enough to give him the necessary courage to go ahead with his plan.

"Nunya," Duo gurgles out coquettishly. The older man grins and chuckles, shaking his head. "Well aren'tya gonna ask me what I mean?"

The man comes dangerously close to Duo's face and flashes a brilliant smile. "I'd rather we skip the talking part," He says breathily, "Unless your partner over there's got a problem."

Duo's half-lidded eyes want to turn to Heero, but Duo chooses to occupy himself with the green-eyed man though he feels Heero's stare boring into the back of his head. _This is your chance_,_ Duo Maxwell_.

Duo puts his hand up to the man's chin and turns it to face him and away from Heero. "What partner?" He whispers directly into the man's ear, which he lustfully bites. Duo proceeds to give the man's neck a series of long, wet kisses down his neck before he brings the man's chin down close to his lips.

Before his tongue collides with the interior of the green-eyed man's mouth, Duo absently looks at Heero from the corner of his eye. He shuts his eyes quickly and focuses his actions entirely into the deep, stifling, and painstakingly erroneous last-ditch attempt at making Heero leave.

The clock that times Duo's shameless act of passion with the green-eyed man barely touches five minutes before he feels the wet warmth of his mistake get ripped away from his embrace. He opens his eyes and finds himself drowning in a nothingness of blue.

"We're leaving," Says the blue, which, despite the deafening bass and strident treble, Duo hears crisply, like the sizzling of flesh in an inescapable fire.

Blue, blue eyes vehemently drag Duo back into Howard's place. They promptly shove him against the wall, and they, for once, unstirred by the splitting pain their action causes. Duo, with his half-lidded eyes and sticky lips, looks up at Heero's indignant countenance. Duo stands up and grits his teeth, staring back with as much hate as he can muster.

"Why are you still here!" Duo cries out loud. "You want truth? Well, you've got your truth, Heero Yuy. It was in that fucking bar, staring you in the face. What else are you waiting for? Are you waiting for me to admit that this is all my fault? Are you waiting for me to tell you every little fucking thing about me? Huh? _What the fuck do you want from me?_"

Heero punches him in the face and Duo falls to the side, grabbing both his stomach and his jaw in pain. He turns to look at Heero, his fury burning the tears streaming from his eyes.

"I don't care about how you choose to live your life, Duo," Heero says coldly. "But you are going to tell me how I can fix this mess you've made of the world."

Duo lurches upwards feebly and spits out blood to the side. "Fuck… you," He heaves.

Heero's resentment is as clear and tangible as is Duo's. "While you were "thinking straight" and wasting your time sidling up to criminals who'd sooner kill you than love you, some residents here reported that they'd killed a group of men who were sent here to investigate your whereabouts and to kill you.

"Meanwhile, while you keep trying to get away from me for no reason, you waste more time, and every minute you don't tell me how to fix this, people are dying. You've sparked a war among the Networks, just like I said you would, and yet you keep deigning me as the enemy when I am the only one here, now, trying to help you."

Duo can do nothing but gape at Heero, because he knows Heero is right. As the sun rises above the horizon on the east, Duo thinks to himself,

_What are you expecting anyway?_

"Grow up, Duo," Heero says gravely. "Or you'll end up losing everything."

A vibrating noise interrupts Heero and Duo's silence. Heero reaches into his pocket, still staring directly into Duo's eyes.

"Yuy, this is Wufei,"

"What's happened?"

"The argument between these networks is escalating into near full-scale guerrilla warfare," Wufei reports, "And just now there's been a massive explosion harming an extensive amount of civilian property."

"Where was the explosion?" Heero asks. Duo listens intently and for the first time an inexorable horror grips his entire soul so strongly that he is unable to breathe, to move.

No, Duo thinks. The world spins beneath his feet, creating a _widening gyre_ that radiates shadows so thick that Duo can't escape the vacuum sending him down, down, down to where _the falcon can't hear the falconer_…

"The explosion was at Maxwell's burned-down junkyard, where we found a hidden underground facility that we believe was the target of the bombing,"

_No_.

--

**NOTES**

- Howard's Fun Room… it was funny at the time.

- That "mice and men" quote is quite famous. I'm sure anyone who's gone to high school knows it. That's the un-Anglicized version from the original poem by Robert Burns, which is why it sounds retarded to Duo.

- Bahaha… oh, Heero, you and your glass houses…

- "Things fall apart" is from "The Second Coming" by W.B. Yeats, which constantly inspires me to write "9." I reference it various time from here to probably chapter 8.

- "Silent Evel Knievel" is from a comment Duo made to Heero in the series.

- What? Come on, the guy's desperate for a little sum'in-sum'in.

- Last italicized part is another part of "The Second Coming."


	6. Coconut Skins

Chapter Six

Coconut Skins

--

-- You can brave decisions  
-- Before you crumble up inside;  
-- Spend your time asking everyone else's permission  
-- Then run away and hide.  
-- Or you can sit on chimneys--  
-- Put some fire up your ass--  
-- No need to know what you're doing or waiting for,  
-- But if anyone should ask:  
-- Tell them I've been licking coconut skins,  
-- And we've been hanging out;  
-- Tell them God just dropped by to forgive our sins  
-- And relieve us our doubt.

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two Squatters: Howard's Place

The ringing in his ears is like an earsplitting siren's call, shrieking in the highest octaves the story of the terrors in the basement, the ghosts in the attic. And Duo can't do anything but wait for it to be over; to be back where the sun was golden and the nights were filled with fireflies instead of firestorms.

The dull thudding of the night skies shakes Duo to rise and face the magnitude of war once more. This pill, however, isn't as easy to swallow when you know you're the one responsible. When you're the only one that knows how it has to end, how it _can_ end, but the problem is you can't do it alone and without giving up everything.

He sits upright on the sweat-soaked couch and barely feels the steady stream of water down his cheeks. He can hear voices wade through the floors, Heero's and others, and he can sense the urgency with which they called for action. The necessity follows Heero's footsteps through the building, approaching Duo, and he can't hide this time.

"Wufei's sent some troops to come pick us up," Heero says. "They're waiting for us downstairs."

"Go." Duo answers pithily.

"This isn't the time to pity yourself," Heero says, grabbing Duo's arm and forcing him to stand upright. Duo's eyes, however illuminated by a mixture of reflected fire and tears, gaze back emptily. Duo heads downstairs, overthrown by fate.

As the vehicle swims through the filth of the southside and climbs up to the abyss in Duo's life, Duo begins to understand the reason for the weight between Heero and himself. It isn't between them, that's all, it's between Duo and the promises of his future. The kind of future you face against a terminal cancer eating away the meaning of your body, your being. The kind of future torn into unidentifiable fragments of light in the eye of black hole. The kind of future never meant for the God of Death.

"Maxwell," He hears a familiar voice say. Wufei approaches him and nods in greeting, his angular jaw glistening in sweat and gunpowder. "I'm sorry. There were no survivors."

Duo looks at him vacantly and smiles. "Nice to see you too, Wufei," He greets in a tone of voice evidently belonging to another face.

Heero moves between the two and asks Wufei about when, where, and who is responsible for the carnage taking place on L2.

"We caught men from all the participating Networks, most of them lowly peons who don't even know who they're really answering to," Wufei explains, pointing to an encampment surrounded by several metal fences. "However, we did find out who was responsible for the explosion at the Graveyard."

Wufei leads them to a small canvas tent, a little ways away from where most of the action is taking place. Heero and Duo sit in wooden stools in front of a large desk covered in papers and bullets.

"We didn't expect to ever deal with anything this big ever again," Wufei says as he searches for something in the papers. He pulls out a folder and opens it up in front of the two other ex-pilots. "We managed to catch an assassin that was stationed near Maxwell's apartment, probably waiting for him in the advent of his finding out about the bombing. He was hired by Karluv Volans to kill you on sight. We assume that Volans is responsible for the bombing, as well, given that information."

"Did they tell you why Volans wants Duo dead?" Heero asks.

"Yes," Wufei replies, pausing to look at Duo. "He said he was sent to kill you because you had stolen something important to the Volans Network."

Heero stiffens visibly at hearing this. Duo's expression remains between nothing and that same Maxwell-brand of glee even as Heero turns to him with potent wrath.

"You…" Heero utters in that same, frighteningly cold manner from the night before. "All this time that I believed he was trying to kill you because he was an avaricious bastard—all this time I was trying to save you because I thought you were fighting for something worth all this—and all this reasonless death is happening _because you stole something_?"

"Yeah," Duo replies succinctly. Heero stands up and uncharacteristically bares his teeth at Duo.

"I risked my reputation and the nation's peace for you, you fucking liar!" Heero yells, above the gunshots and cries.

"Nobody asked you to," Duo says. He looks at Heero, unswervingly absent. "…You should leave."

Wufei does not respond to the actions of the two and remains silent even as Heero walks out of the tent. He sits down in a stool across the table from Duo, whose eyes are closed in prayer or meditation or regret—Wufei can't tell.

"What did you take, Duo?" Wufei asks. Duo is silent for a long time, tired of forcing the weight to stay on him, keep him company, making him feel whole.

"The head of Wing Zero," Duo admits with chilling finality.

--

A.C. 205 – Sanc Kingdom: Chamber of the Vice Foreign Minister

Heero arrives promptly to the Chamber as ordered by Relena Peacecraft, the ESUN Vice Foreign Minister. Upon entering, he bows respectfully, cleanly dressed in standard ESUN guard uniform (though with many more pins and patches than any soldier in existence). He remains bowing until the radiantly-dressed Relena swivels around and acknowledges him.

He observes her careful steps towards him. She is bathed in soft accents of light, glimmering like some fairy-tale princess in a bouffant gown in shades of rose. She is a sight to behold for nations and colonies alike, and tonight she will be addressing problems and solutions to all the leaders of the ESUN.

"Thank you, Principal, for accepting my request for your company at tonight's gala," She says curtly, properly, perfectly. She smile a tender smile only the leader of peaceful nations can. Heero holds out his arm and she places herself within his protection happily.

As they walk out onto the balcony and wave to the men and women applauding them from the floor below, Relena begins her straightforward line of questioning.

"Where have you been?" She asks, discreetly enough for only his ears to hear.

"Missions on behalf of the Preventers," Heero answers loosely. The commencement music begins to play and they are led to descend the stairs to join the other leaders in the main hall.

"I will have to talk tonight about the civil war in L2," Relena continues speaking. "Were you aware of Duo's involvement in it?"

"Yes, somewhat," He replies. They are seated at an elevated table facing the crowd. Relena rises from her seat, but turns to Heero once more.

"Are you involved?" She asks. Heero does not look at her.

"No," He answers.

--

Beads of sweat begin to drip down from Heero's forehead to Relena's cheek as he moves back and forth against her body, supple against the war-hardened tautness of his heart and soul. It doesn't feel right, he knows, because there are many moments in the short time they consummate that their breaths and movements fumble and resist. At least, his movements do.

He stops when he hears her sigh audibly and meticulously separates himself from the softness of her arms. Relena smiles at him tenderly. He looks down at her from the edge of the bed and sees the Sanc Kingdom laid out before him in all its glory. It makes him a little ill.

"I'm going to clean off," Heero says, gathering his clothing and heading for the bathroom (the biggest and most grandiose in the entire estate). He steps into the shower, unable to subdue the emotions surging throughout his body even with the coldest temperatures the water could throw at him. His body shakes from time to time as he gets dressed.

Suddenly, a vibrating in his breast pocket distracts him from the thought of Duo's blank eyes. He answers his phone, surprised to hear Trowa's voice.

"Are you with Duo?" Trowa asks, wasting little time in getting to his point.

"No," Heero says, expression darkening at the mention of Duo's name. "I've left the situation at the hands of Wufei and the Preventers. Duo should be with them."

"We just got off the phone with Wufei, and he says that Duo's already left," Quatre interjects in the background. "He didn't mention you weren't with him, so we thought we might be able to talk to Duo through you."

"Well, you can't," Heero snaps. "What do you need from Duo?"

"We need to know where it is," Trowa answers.

"You mean the thing he stole," Heero says with palpable ire.

A pause. "You don't know what he stole, do you, Heero?" Quatre says with a trace of sadness.

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two: Just Outside the Graveyard

"But… how is that possible?" Wufei asks in disbelief. "None of the Gundams should have survived!"

"I don't know how or why, but Wing Zero's head survived," Duo explains, "And along with it, the ZERO System."

Wufei falls back in his seat, stunned. "That explains why Volans and Minor were so desperate to get it back. If they were in possession of that head, it would mean disaster for the ESUN as we know it. It's no wonder they keep coming after you."

"That begs the question: why are they trying to kill me?" Duo asks rhetorically. "I'm the only one who knows where Wing Zero is."

"Which means they've already found it," Wufei says, troubled. "Shit! I have to send word immediately about this. Excuse me, Duo," He says, running to the video-receiver to give his report.

While Wufei occupies himself, Duo walks to the tent entrance to watch the war spewing lives and fire all across L2. He starts to chuckle.

"All this, for you," Duo murmurs hollowly. "I exchanged my entire life to save this present for you, Heero Yuy."

"That's just human nature, Maxwell," He hears Wufei say from behind him.

"Pardon?"

"Sacrificing everything for the things you love," Wufei explains. "Or people, in this case."

He wants to turn around and shout at Wufei, I don't love him, but he knows it's untrue. He wants to shout that his sacrifices have been in vain, in the name of selfishness, just to keep his secrets, to deny _who he is_—but he can't. What's the use?

And yet, it just doesn't matter, Duo thinks, defeated.

--

Heero sits on the edge of the wide, pool-like bathtub in the middle of the 900 square foot bathroom. His hands grip the thick golden floral trim lining the tub in epiphanic shock. His heart beats quickly, unmanageable, irresolute.

"But… why?" Heero asks no one. "Why did he keep this from me? From all of us?"

"He's just following his emotions," Trowa says.

"His emotions?" Heero says incredulously. "He sacrificed peace to selfishly keep Wing Zero a secret from all of us!"

"No, not all of us," Quatre says, ever comfortingly. "Just from _you_."

Heero stays silent.

"He was going to give it to _you_."

There's a knocking on the door and Heero abruptly mutters a farewell to Quatre and Trowa. He puts his phone away just as Relena slowly opens the double-doors. She finds Heero standing very close to her, which surprises her enough to make her step back and apologize.

"I'm sorry, Heero," She says quietly. "I heard the shower turn off quite a while ago and I was worried that something had happened when you didn't come out immediately."

"No, it's fine, I just have a lot of things on mind,"

"As of right now?" Relena asks with a knowing smile. "Or has it been this way since you first spoke to Duo?"

Heero's looking at her, but Relena knows he's far away and as lost from her as he had always been. After ten years of staying by his side, she has only noticed how devoid of understanding she has always been concerning him. He had never been happy, never been anything else other than the soldier. There had been nothing much to his life until he came waltzing back, Maxwell's demon, shutting out all past actions and driving him to reignite his passion for the mission—for a future worth saving.

Heero embraces her. "I'm going to L2," He states decisively.

"No," Relena says deliberately. "Go to Duo."

--

Wufei helps Duo load a crate of grenades onto the back of a camouflaged pickup truck already stacked with different weapons and necessary items for Duo's plan of attack against Volans. Both men wipe the sweat from their brow after they lock the provisions in.

"There, you're all set," Wufei says, dusting off his hands. "But remember that I don't want to be incriminated in your headhunt mission. I'm doing you this as a favor, so that all of this will stop."

Duo nods and surveys the battle raging on around them. "What's going to happen?" Duo asks.

"They're sending all the troops we can possibly accommodate," Wufei replies. "I'll make sure we're more preoccupied with the rest of the fighting networks than we are with Volans."

Duo waves good-bye and hops into the driver's seat of the truck and starts the engine. "Thanks," He shouts to Wufei.

"If anything goes wrong, you know who to call!" Wufei shouts back.

The fires engulfing L2 dim as Duo drives further from them, as does the necessity once present in his eyes. With every turn of the wheels below him, Duo loses parts of himself he was never sure were there in the first place. But as he feels himself give in to numbness, there are pockets of feelings he doesn't remember and then they are gone and left only for memory.

There is the pocket that holds the faces of Jimmy, Rider, and Won Tonshu, and the vacancy on their faces behind the glass lids of their caskets.

There is the pocket that holds Axel, Morty, Sonny, and the others, all faces that love him and trust him and need him—all faces that were eaten up by the fire of selfishness and revenge.

There is the pocket that holds Father Maxwell, Sister Helen and all his friends, all of them who prayed for a promise of a better world and rewarded by God with nothing but death.

There is the pocket that holds Hilde, with whom life gained new meanings and possibilities, and yet for some reason she, like all those in his life that matter, found it necessary to take it all away just as he was sure he could have it forever.

And then there is the pocket that holds Heero Yuy; a pocket he must relinquish for its own good. For the good of the world. Otherwise everything is truly lost.

Duo stops driving, finding himself amidst lush, transplanted trees in the middle of nowhere. His knuckles turn white from his solid grip on the steering wheel. He breathes heavily and begins to pant uncontrollably.

Holding his head in despair, Duo cries.

He cries for the anguish, the dreams, the losses, and his life—he cries.

--

**NOTES**

- Yes, it's implied that Heero has somewhat of a more-than-friends relationship with Relena, as in this isn't the first time they've done the horizontal mambo; but his unhappiness with it and with her are explicit.

- When did Duo tell Trowa and Quatre? Some time after their first conversation, in order to ensure that it would be destroyed if Duo died somehow.

- How does Relena know about Duo? Woman's intuition. She once was blind but now can see.


	7. Me, My Yoke, and I

Chapter Seven

Me, My Yoke, and I

--

-- Won't you beat my drum?  
-- Won't you read my book?  
-- Won't you push my hand?  
-- Won't you break my fall?

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two: Just Outside the Graveyard

The heat of battle hits Heero the moment he steps out of his military humvee, thickening his lungs the same way war had done nearly ten years ago. He runs towards the encampment and pulls aside random soldiers, asking them for Wufei's whereabouts. They point him towards a bunker to the east of the encampment, where the Preventers succeeded earlier in driving back Orion's forces. He calls out to Wufei, who jumps down from the top of the barricade and runs over.

"What are you doing here?" He says, wiping dirt from his cheek. "I thought you'd left for good. I called earlier but you were with the Minister Peacecraft at the summit. I hope they discussed the state of things here at length, because we need as many troops here as possible to quell this before it gets even more out of hand."

"The Minister Peacecraft has ordered the troops personally and are following me here with all the provisions you've asked for," Heero states to a pleased Wufei. "This will be over before you know it."

"So what are you doing here?" Wufei repeats, though he already knows the answer. "He's not here, you know."

"I know," Heero states, "But I also need time to find him. Meanwhile, I'm here to help."

"Good," Wufei says, "Because I'm going in to take out Orion's headquarters, and I need you to break the Canis Major stronghold in the west,"

"Mission accepted," Heero says, smirking.

--

Heero outfits himself in a spare Preventers stealth uniform, armed only with two grenades, a time bomb, and a handgun. He runs haphazardly through the bloodbath, taking down anything that moved before him and miraculously dodging the crazed firing of guns all around him. He dives behind remnants of a broken building and crawls around, taking down two men in a shooting frenzy with two clean shots to the head. He shoves the two bodies off a sewage entrance and drops down to the muck below.

According to directions from Wufei, when Heero hits the westernmost wall, there will be a ladder leading up to just outside the building being held hostage by the Canis Major forces. Heero sees it and climbs the ladder, hearing rushing footsteps and the thudding of explosions above. He counts to three before he pushes against the pothole lid with all his strength and throws it aside. He hears warnings being called out but he's already unpinned a grenade and thrown it in the direction of the voices. The grenade explodes and Heero climbs out into open air and runs for the nearest wall as gunshots follow him.

"We're being infiltrated!" Someone shouts, but most of the men are busy fending off Preventers to care. Some men are pulled away and pointed to Heero's direction, but Heero manages to take out one or two before he finds the building's fire escape.

He jumps and takes hold of the ladder, bracing himself for the quick fall. Upon hearing bullets ricochet off the red metal of the ladder, he speedily heads upwards and winds around the stairs. He kicks open the door at the top and begins to shoot down all the shocked henchmen in his path. Once the hallway is clear of men, he spies a large vent in the ceiling. He grabs hold of the pipes two feet away from the vent and swings violently enough to kick the shaft cover off. He jumps and brings himself up in time to hear the presence of more men come to take him down. He races down the ventilation shafts, hurrying to where the door to the stairs is located. When he finds it, he jumps down from the shaft and enters the door, killing every man unlucky enough to cross his path. He reaches the first floor and readies the time bomb in his hands, setting it to explode in five minutes.

He pushes the doors open and sees the men of Canis Major, with Major himself yelling orders to everyone holding a gun. Bullets, missile shooters, and guns littered the floor, as well as hundreds of henchmen shooting wildly out the windows. Heero throws the time bomb amidst the sea of killers before any of them can react to his presence. He catches the eye of Canis Major as he kills the two men directly in front of him and prepares to jump out the window.

"SHOOT HIM!" Sirius Canis Major screams, but Heero breaks the window in one swift kick and jumps through before the men switch their target. As he runs to safety, however, Heero is shot in the leg by one of Major's men. He stumbles, but continues moving in jagged patterns. In the last moments before the explosion, Heero manages to throw himself into the backseat of a bullet-worn car, which is thrown to its side by the massive aftershock of the bomb.

Heero, still inside the car, hears the Preventers cheering and moving into the Canis Major territory rapidly. He removes a walkie-talkie from his pocket and says to Wufei, "Mission accomplished."

"Good to hear," Wufei answers back quickly. "I've got things taken care of here, too. You get out okay?"

"My leg's been shot," Heero says, "But I'm alright."

"I'll be there in ten minutes with some of our medics," Says Wufei. Heero drops the walkie-talkie and pops out of the car's broken backseat window, fragments of glass inching their way into his skin despite the thick gloves. He watches the Preventers arrest the leftover Canis Major men, in shock at their sudden defeat, and sees Wufei's humvee racing towards him, siren blaring.

He runs out, followed by the perennially beautiful Sally Po and two medics wheeling out a stretcher.

"Come on, we're taking you to back to the base," Sally says with a warm smile. Heero shakes his head, refusing to get into the stretcher, but Wufei orders the two medics to accost him into it. Heero, tired, stops fighting and lies down. He closes his eyes and thinks of Duo.

--

Sally is kneeling on the ground, bandaging up Heero's wounded leg. "You can't move it, can you?" She asks, and Heero nods. "That means some nerves were hit. You might have to stay here a while 'til you start feeling something again."

"I can move my feet," He lies, and Sally knows it. "Where's Wufei? I need to speak with him."

Sally smiles and tells Wufei to come over through a walkie-talkie. She leaves Heero in the tent and five minutes later, Wufei walks through the door, looking relieved. "We've got most of everything under control now," He reports. "What did you need?"

"Where's Duo?"

"I don't know. I didn't ask; I told him I wanted no part in his revenge," Wufei says, "But if you want a guess, then he's probably going after Volans on a suicide mission as we speak."

One of Wufei's men calls out to him and he turns his attention to the soldier to listen to his report. When he turns back around to face Heero, he finds he's already gone, and so is is laptop.

--

Heero hobbles to a tent a good distance away from where Wufei is and waits for the men inside to leave. He goes in, zips the tent up, and connects Wufei's laptop to the supplemental electronics available. After he is enabled access to the mainframe, Heero pulls up the satellite tracking program and types in several numbers.

The computer runs the numbers and comes up with the diagram of the Volans Estate, proving Wufei's guesses correctly. With almost genius precision, he memorizes the schematics of the Estate. He picks up every weapon he can see inside the tent and makes his way towards his humvee with an icy determination. The only difference this time is that he's no longer on a mission.

--

A.C. 205 – Somewhere Above the Mediterranean Sea

Heero swiftly flew across the southeastern Mediterranean Sea, headed to the nearest secret PW facility possible. He's pushed the jet to its speed limits, feeling something like panic for the first time in a long time. He felt confident enough that at this distance, auto-pilot mode was suitable. After all, there was someone in grave danger of dying right beside him. Disoriented, he turned his attention to the seriously hemorrhaging Duo sitting upright and completely bare beside him. He'd only managed to use his shirt as a bandage, but the blood was flowing relentlessly like a waterfall.

Duo was feverish and his skin was like ice. His eyes were flickering in strange patterns; Heero reckoned he'd never stayed long enough in one place to watch a stranger slowly die, let alone someone he knew. He was struck by an odd concern for the man before him, but it was just now that he acknowledged it completely.

No, that's not it, he realized. He wasn't concerned so much as angry. As he removed his pants to try and quell the bleeding more effectively, he remembered something Duo'd said to him before, when they were younger and still partners.

"I'm surprised… Heero," whispered a barely-conscious Duo, as if the fading ex-pilot were reading his mind. "You… really turn up in the most… unexpected places…" Then the other went limp.

Heero's heart pounded as he reached to touch Duo's neck to check for a pulse. It's there, but it's fading, he thinks. He rips his pants to expose as much cloth as possible and rapidly winds it around Duo's severely wounded stomach. I can't hold you on much longer, but we're almost there, Duo.

Thirty minutes later, Heero landed the jet right on top of a big building somewhere in the city of Tunis. He hurriedly took Duo in his arms and ran desperately to the facility's clinic. He'd arranged ahead of time for the doctors inside to have everything ready for an emergency case, and soon enough Duo was in a stretcher being wheeled to surgery. Nobody even bothered to ask why Heero was almost naked when they saw the tattered clothing tied messily around the pale man that had been in his arms a mere thirty seconds ago.

It took four hours of surgery before they were able to come out and tell Heero that Duo would be okay, but only barely. It seemed that a sharp object, a scalpel, had cut open a five inch gash on the side of his stomach and was lodged inside the entire time. One of his kidneys was lacerated because of it and he lost nearly 55 of the amount of blood in his body. They were just about to sew him up, but before the surgeon turned to leave Heero grabbed his arm and put a small chip in his hand.

"I need you to put that inside of him," Heero requested. "Find a way so that it won't hurt him. But find a way."

The surgeon nodded and made his way back into the operating room. Heero, relieved, went downstairs and prepared to have Duo brought to the high-security wing of the building as soon as the operation was over.

That evening, the nurses wheeled Duo into his room, where Heero was peacefully sleeping. He awoke just as the nurses began to lift Duo into the bed. Heero got up and helped them, thanking them as they wheeled the stretcher back out and left the two men alone. Heero stayed up the entire night watching him, bringing along a five-hundred-page report to keep himself occupied. Every once in a while he would get up and get himself some coffee, because he wondered that if he slept, Duo would be gone when he woke up. The idiot seems persistent enough, he thought, and he wondered whimsically why.

"_Oh man, this is gonna be quite the battle, isn't it?" He says, piloting the transport plane above the fighting below us. What a nuisance; it's like he doesn't know what he's doing or fighting for._

"_This mission's really big," I say, condescending. "I don't think you get it."_

_He's like an undisciplined child and the future's on the line. I don't really care for people like him; they're the most likely to die in these situations. They don't know how to keep distance. He doesn't know what a soldier's supposed to be._

"_You bet I do," He says, but I'm not convinced. "This is our chance to finally destroy the OZ organization."_

"_This time is different," I reply. I knew he didn't get it. How annoying. "We're gonna eliminate every OZ leader."_

_But then he says, "Yeah. Then I can go back to space," and I don't know what to say. I don't get it. He's supposed to have the mission's goal in mind; that's what a soldier's for. What a stupid thing to succeed in battle for, going back to space. What does space hold for him? All there is for us is a nameless existence wherever we live._

_Why's he so damn happy about it?_

It's morning before Heero was woken up by the soft rustling on the bed. He'd been entranced by the memory of their war, burned deep into his mind. He watched Duo's eyes flutter open, the sun shining against the clarity of his wide indigo eyes.

"Don't move too much," He said to the other.

--

A.C. 205 – The Volans Estate

Volans taps his hairy fingers on his desk, obviously seething. Hilde sits across from him with a vacuous expression. He throws a pile of papers in her face and points menacingly to the television above him.

"Are you gonna tell me that you don't give a shit about this, Schbeiker? Huh?!" He yells, slamming his fist on the table and shaking all the ornaments off. Hilde barely flinches. "You little bitch… you said everything would work out perfectly, and all that's fuckin' happening is that we're losing. And that bastard _still_ has Wing Zero! You said it would be in that fuckin' underground safehouse of his!"

"I lied," Hilde says quietly.

"What the hell do you mean, 'you lied,' you fucking whore!" Volans explodes shoving everything off his table in one fell swoop. Hilde remains sitting stoically in her chair.

"I had you blow up that underground facility to bring Duo to you," Hilde explains calmly. "Every person Duo cared about was in that safehouse. And now they're gone."

"And how the fuck is that little shit coming here and trying to kill me do me any good?!"

"Because your base is underground, too," She says. "He will come here and he will plan to kill you—that's precisely right. That's all he feels has left to do. But since we know that, then he's essentially trapped. And you will get your revenge—_including_ Wing Zero."

Volans grips his desk and is settled by the cool confidence of Hilde's skillful arrangements. He sits back down and sighs, displeased, but rational all the same. He has already dispersed most of his men to engage in the battle taking place in L2 to protect his territory and to establish dominance over the other networks if and when the war is won. But according to the coverage, the Preventers are making more progress since both the Canis Major and Orion strongholds have been destroyed; if he's going to lose the war to the government, he thinks, he might as well get something out of it. And Wing Zero's head—and moreover, the ZERO System—is worth it all in the end.

However, he wonders about the laconic ex-business partner of Duo Maxwell sitting across from him.

--

A.C. 203 – The Graveyard

Hilde sat in Duo's office to take over completely business operations for the week since he was very, very sick with a cold. She didn't particularly like being in Duo's office, simply because it was so dark and gloomy and colorless. All she could see was red and black. Even the paintings he had on the wall were sad and lonely (she especially found the painting with the four people in the 'Phillies' bar late at night profoundly depressing). The only things of noticeable color were a book called _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_ and the golden picture frame sitting on Duo's desk. Whenever she looked at it, she frowned, because—

A sudden knocking at the door pulled her away from her thoughts. Who could be here so late at night? She wondered as she opened the door. There stood Karluv Volans and Victor Leo Minor, the two owners of the Shoreline Salvaging Company and Lion's Den Salvaging (respectively). She greeted them happily and asked them to have a seat.

"What can I do for you gentlemen today?" She asked, chipper. She was unsure whether she should be as happy as she was because both the men before her bore very grave expressions.

"Don't play dumb, Schbeiker!" Leo Minor yelled. Hilde was taken aback.

"Excuse me?" She asked him, confused about the hostility directed at her.

"Calm down, Victor, let me do the talking," Volans said. "Miss Schbeiker, has Mr. Maxwell informed you of his recent actions?"

Hilde thought about it, but Duo hadn't told her anything of importance. "No," She replied. "Nothing particularly notable."

"Then I will assume he did not tell you about his illegal procurement of a very important item from Mr. Leo Minor here," Volans stated. His eyes were like daggers though his voice was steady, at least it felt that way to Hilde. What was he talking about, Hilde thinks, Duo stole something?

"Yes, Maxwell stole something very important from me," Leo Minor growled. "And I want it back immediately!"

"I'm sorry," said Hilde. "If Duo had stolen something, he would have told me. But since he didn't, I'm going to have to disagree with you on this. He hasn't taken anything."

"You're very incorrect," Volans responds. "Because only he would have any vested interest in stealing the head of Wing Zero."

Hilde looked at him, astounded to the point of silence.

"Am I right, Miss Schbeiker?"

_Why… why wouldn't he tell me? Why would he lie about this? Haven't I done enough for him to trust me?_

_Do I mean so little still…?_

She could feel the anger welling up inside her heart; it was a rage that had been building up slowly over the years, after every failed attempt at a relationship with Duo, after doing all that he asked and more.

She sat there, still. Both men stood up. Volans slid a business card across the table toward Hilde. "When you're ready to make arrangements to give it back, give me a call," Volans said with sinister amusement. "It is, after all, your duty. Weren't you one of those volunteers ready to save the world? Well… what do you think he's planning to do with that head, if he hasn't destroyed it already?"

Volans laughs and turns to her one more time before he leaves. "Just so you know, he probably hasn't."

Hilde had been balling her fists so hard that her nails had cut into her skin, sending streams of blood down to the table. She glowered hatefully at the photograph on Duo's desk as if she were Medea looking down upon Jason from her burning chariot in the sky. In this very instant, she realized everything possible there was to know about Duo Maxwell.

"It's always been about you, hasn't it?" She said to the picture of Heero and Duo, taken somewhere during a resting period when Heero was bandaging a wounded hand and Duo was suspiciously hanging around in the background. Whoever had taken the picture caught Duo before he had a chance to cover his face with his hand. Heero looked back at Hilde with that stern, irritated look.

"After this is all over, I'm going to make him realize you're not worth anything."

--

A.C. 205 – The Volans Estate

"Hilde," Volans calls out as Hilde begins to exit his office. "Why are you so bent on destroying Maxwell? Weren't you his wife or something?"

Hilde stops in her tracks but doesn't turn around. Volans expects an answer, but Hilde just leaves.

She walks down a few halls and down the elevator some four floors, grimly downcast in every movement.

_Why are you so bent on destroying Maxwell?_

She puts her hand on a sensor-pad and is granted access into her room. She sits in front of a dimly-illuminated laptop and accesses the computer's call-function.

"Hilde Schbeiker, reporting to the Vice Foreign Minister Relena Peacecraft," She states, and the receiving ends puts her through. After a minute, Relena's face appears before Hilde on the laptop.

"Miss Schbeiker," Relena says, nodding her head slightly. "What is the status of our operations?"

"Volans has decided to stop pursuing the battle on L2, seeing as the Preventers have succeeded in turning the tides to the government's favor," Hilde relays. "However, our plans will only succeed upon the arrival of Duo Maxwell here."

"Are you certain that you will be able to extract the information from him this time?" Relena asks strictly. "There has been too much death on his behalf. We cannot allow any more of it."

"I'm certain, Minister," Hilde answers. "I will have this taken care of, as well as the problem of Volans. I'm sure that we will have obtained the Gundam head by tomorrow, at the least."

"In that case, I will be sending in troops by tomorrow morning to pick up the perpetrators and to find the Gundam head as soon as possible. In order to preserve peace, we must find it, and we must destroy it. It cannot be allowed to exist. I thank you for understanding," Relena says and then nods farewell to Hilde. "Good luck."

Hilde shuts off the monitor and unplugs the computer, settling it back into a titanium briefcase. She walks over to the bathroom and begins to undress. She looks at herself in the mirror, ashamed at the culpability written clear across her face—her whole body. She shakes head to try and take the image away.

"It's almost over, Duo," She speaks softly, reminiscent of the Hilde Duo once knew. "And then we'll start again."

--

**NOTES**

- Heero is waiting for Duo to arrive at his destination before he tracks him.

- Everything in past tense is usually a flashback to an earlier point in the story. If it's really far back, it'll be in italics. This part in past tense describes Heero rescuing Duo from Volans' place. The italics within the flashback is a scene in Heero's POV before a skirmish with OZ troops in the series (subsequently, it uses dialogue from the series).

- Hilde is referring to a copy of "Nighthawks" in Duo's office. All the things parallel to Heero.

- I am referring to this photo: /img/117290

- Obvious allusion to the play _Medea_ by Euripedes.

**Big huge thanks** to Angelyn, Tanya G, and jeangreymullinsjr. for your support! Thank you so much for reading, reviewing, and most of all, enjoying my labor of love. Like Hilde says, it's almost over! :) Thanks for sticking through!


	8. Grey Room

Chapter Eight

Grey Room

--

-- If I squeeze my grape, then I drink my wine.  
-- Oh, 'cause nothing is lost—it's just frozen in frost;  
-- And it's opening time, and there's no-one in line…  
-- But I've still got me to be your open door.  
-- I've still got me to be your sandy shore.  
-- I've still got me to cross your bridge in this storm,  
-- And I've still got me to keep you warm  
-- —Warmer than warm, yeah

--

A.C. 205 – Just Outside the Volans Estate

Duo, map in hand, finds the Volans loading zone at the northeast of L2 where his men are retreating from the front. It is a mass of bodies: dead, alive, somewhere in between, all crawling about in hysteria. They move in slow-motion in Duo's eyes, whose mind is neither present in time and unbearably trapped to act within it. His body is beyond him; it belongs to the God of Death.

"_I wouldn't mind being the God of the Death forever,"_ he recalls, stricken with the oddest feeling of empty nostalgia like a dying man reminiscing about his childhood. Amidst the feverish turmoil of retreat, Duo's able to move about as freely as he can. His eyes are tucked underneath a wash of brown pushed down by his black cap. Holding onto a simple backpack, he jumps into a truck's passenger seat nonchalantly.

"You get shot out there, boy?" Says the man in the driver's seat—a scruffy man of around fifty, with a piece of wood hanging out of his mouth and his biceps slashed and caked in blood—as he looks at Duo's bandaged arm which has been stained with someone else's blood. "You're lucky to get out with just a shot in th' arm, sonny. Young guys like you who don't know nothin' 'bout war been dyin' out there real fast, like fish in a barrel,"

Duo grunts, sulking down to hide his face. The other man laughs gruffly, coughing out blood onto the steering wheel. "Shit," he says, "I hope I make it to the safehouse, at least. From there, I'll be okay and get that dough they been promisin' me."

The old man survives, much to Duo's dismay, and they enter the Volans Estate grounds no problem. Duo's earlier assumption about the Volans Estate is proven wrong when the man begins to head to a road behind the big, peach villa. Duo thinks for a moment that he's going to have to kill the old bastard beside him but decides against it and waits out the ride. He spies in the distance a down-sloping, dimly lit entrance. The man has coughed up enough blood without abandon that the windshield is stained with his fluids, forcing the guards to let him and Duo inside without much inspection.

As soon as the man parks the truck inside the underground safehouse and doubles over in a blood coughing fit, Duo takes his gun and silencer out and does the bastard a favor by shooting him in the head. He removes from his pocket a small remote control with a prominent red button. He pushes it and somewhere back in the northeastern area of L2, another gigantic explosion occurs from the back of a Preventer pickup truck and wipes out everything within a one-mile radius, singing everything from trees, to buildings, to fragile human bodies seeking refuge from combat.

"_Dei iudicium_, _recquiescat in pase,_" Duo whispers, closing the man's eyes with gloved fingers and leaving the remote control in his hands.

_By the judgment of God, rest in peace_.

He moves stealthily through the halls, every sounding alarm and trepid progression of footsteps all around dulling in his ears. All that is running through Duo's head are the numbers: the inches, feet, and potential energy necessary to move through the hall and turn the corner; the time it takes to bring down a roomful of unsuspecting men; the number of bullets and grenades still left in his arsenal.

He arrives at the bolted office doors, an area strangely devoid of rushing human bodies, as if it is estranged in a separate dimension. Duo takes out a two-inch switchblade and undoes the side of the sensor-pad, revealing a mess of wires and sockets. He attaches a thin, black wire to the exposed motherboard and waits for his system neutralizer to disable the locks. The code breaks and the doors open, and Duo doesn't stop for a moment to doubt the smoothness of his entry.

--

_Turning and turning in the widening gyre  
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;  
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;  
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,  
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere  
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;  
The best lack all conviction, while the worst  
Are full of passionate intensity._

_Surely some revelation is at hand;  
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.  
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out  
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi  
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert  
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,  
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,  
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it  
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.  
The darkness drops again; but now I know  
That twenty centuries of stony sleep  
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,  
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,  
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?_

Hilde stands in the middle of a room filled with computer screens and strewn chairs, flickering like an electric ghost in the static playing an opera of light around her. She stands in the middle hidden under a wide-brimmed hat and fluorescent shadows. Duo's breath is caught in his lungs and he lets it wade there for as long as he can hold it, trying to see if the pain of asphyxiation can surpass the disappearance of his soul.

He approaches her, gun in hand and pointed at that fucking wide-brimmed hat, her head—her smiling, caring head—her vicious, traitorous head—her sadly smiling head, looking guiltily at the floor. They stand before each other and let life as it has been for the past few months whirl in between them like a _blood-dimmed tide loosed, _drowning everything left inside of the braided, vengeful pilot.

_We're here, now, just you and I, Duo. You've come all the way here to face your biggest fears, to face the future you've doomed yourself with. You would have spent years running away and hiding and lying to yourself. But you can't do that now._

_Now you've only got the truth left._

"Smile for me, Duo," Hilde says softly. "Just this time." She keeps her head bowed down, hidden.

"I'm not here for you," He says frigidly. "I'm here for Volans."

Hilde smiles and looks up at him with sad eyes that are too familiar, too precious to Duo. Even now he can't help but want to save her, to take back the life he can never have again. It's not her fault, he thinks.

"Why don't you just ask what it is you really want to know?" She asks.

It's silent and Duo knows the weight's back. All at once, the burden sends him spiraling down to a place of denial and darkness and helplessness. There's nothing in Hilde's eyes that can comfort him in his situation, he realizes, because there's nothing left there for him to receive. He laughs.

"What do you want me to say, Hilde?" He snaps at her harshly, full of bitter emotions. "You don't think I knew that I was responsible from destroying our life from the start? You don't think I'd foretold that somewhere along the line, you'd betray me, and I'd end up losing everything that mattered to me?"

Duo laughs harder this time, his face contorted into an expression between absolute suffering and sincere relief—even he's not sure what he feels.

"Duo—"

"No, you shut the fuck up for now," He interrupts violently. "You'll have your fucking turn. Right now you're going to listen to me. You're going to listen to me and you're going to tell me everything I want. It's the least you can do, you heartless bitch.

"First and foremost, you're going to tell me what _any_ of them had to do with this. What Sonny, Morty, Axel—_all_ of them—what place they had in this, because _they didn't have a place_ and _they didn't deserve this_.

"Next you're going to tell me why the _fuck_ you'd go to Volans before you'd go to me—why the _fuck_ you'd trust _him_ over _me_.

"And then you're going to tell _why the fuck you're doing this_. What did I do, Hilde? Was I wrong to build a life with you? Was I wrong about this business being what we both wanted? I fucking loved the hell out of you and our business and our family! _I was so fucking happy for the first time in my entire life_—"

"YOU WERE NEVER HAPPY!" Yells Hilde, her voice filled with a passion so raw it makes Duo's heart bleed to hear it. Duo's hand trembles as he's driven to silence by her tearful outburst, unable to bring anything more out of himself. Hilde cries uncontrollably but continues to speak.

"How much longer are you planning on hiding, Duo? How much longer are you going to run from the truth?" She throws off her hat and approaches Duo, dark circles lining her red eyes. "You were never happy with me. With me, with the business, it was like you were wading through a dream, always waiting for something to wake you up and make you _feel something_. Anything. Just to give your life a sense of meaning. You would have given up your life sooner or later."

Duo's strength falters and his hand falls to his side. The pistol tumbles to the floor, tinkling against the marble tiles, etching his weakness into the ground. He looks at Hilde as if she is an illusion. They let an uncomfortable silence pass, seeking questions and answers neither could express.

Suddenly, his face softens and he looks at her with equivalent sadness.

"I was happy, Hilde," He responds quietly. "I really was."

"You see?" She says, oddly and painfully amused. "That's your problem. It's over, Duo. Your life is over as you know it, so why can't you just admit to me, at least, why you gave it all up? Why their lives meant nothing in the grander scheme of things because of _that piece of shit, _who wouldn't have even given a shit about you had you never walked back into his life?"

"They mattered to me," Duo mumbles, clenching his fists. "They mattered more than anything to me!"

"Bullshit, Duo! Take a look around you! You _left_ them to die so you could have a chance with him! You were gonna risk sending us back into war!"

"Is that all this is to you?" Duo asks. "You think I spent ten years of my life wishing for a reason to go back to him? I could have gone back any goddamn time I wanted, but I didn't, because I wanted to be happy! I wanted _us_, all of us, to be happy! I stole Wing Zero because Volans would have used it for war!"

"No he wouldn't have! Because _I _would have been there to destroy it! I did all this to get Wing Zero—to save everyone—and I risked all those lives, including mine, and no matter what, you just wouldn't give it up! You kept asking for more and more death, as if you were _obsessed_ with killing _everything_ around you, because you're a mon—"

Duo slaps her, hard, and sends her flying sideways against a computer. The computer shatters on the ground, crackling and sizzling against the backdrop of Hilde's rapid breathing. She rises shakily and faces Duo with sadistic determination.

"None of this had to happen," Hilde seethes, "You could have turned over Wing Zero to Relena and none of this would have happened. But you didn't. And you didn't trust me enough to tell me, which meant you'd never tell me. So I did what I had to—I risked my life to serve under Volans to make sure I'd get Wing Zero and destroy it and to keep you alive. And that's still my mission, Duo, unless you plan on killing me tonight. My job as a citizen of this nation is to get rid of that head once and for all.

"At this very moment, you're already surrounded. I knew you'd come to try and kill Volans because that is the kind of stupid thing a guilty man would do. They will torture you until you give them the location and then probably kill you. But if you tell me where it is, I will save you. Tomorrow morning, Relena will be here with troops ready to take down the Volans Network. She has promised that nothing will happen to you if you lead us to Wing Zero. Everything will be alright after that. You and I will be able to start over."

Hilde watches him, but Duo doesn't move. His head is bowed, bathed in shadows. Blood is dripping from his clenched fists.

"Start over?" He responds wistfully. "Why should I do that?" He walks over to a desk and seats himself calmly, folding his hands in his lap, his back turned to Hilde.

"You can pick up that gun and shoot me while I'm not looking, or you can wait for them to torture me, gut me alive, whatever it is that turns them on," Duo says. "Or I can do it myself. Either way, the results are the same. I'll take my secrets to the grave if I have to."

"Don't be stupid, Duo!" Hilde shouts. "If anyone finds that head, you'll be damning us all!"

"Then damn you all," He says.

An blast of rubble and scraps of metal from the floor above causes Hilde to fall to the ground and Duo to fall out of his chair. Amidst the sea of smoke and dynamite particles, he sees a familiar shadow hover above him with and outstretched arm. His eyes pierce through to fog to meet blue, blue eyes full of urgency.

"Come on," Heero Yuy says to him. Duo stays still, eyes wide in distress, moving only to try and pull his arm away from the other. But Heero forcibly grabs his arm and pulls him close. "Please," He whispers. Duo accepts his plea like a ghost, a dream—acknowledging that, still, somewhere deep inside of him he was afraid of accepting the truths that had flowed so effortlessly from Hilde's soul.

Hilde glimpses and swears that, from beneath her arm and through the fog of stone and steel, she sees Duo led away by an angel in white that looks too much like Heero Yuy.

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two Southside: Howard's Place

It's been almost two days since the incident at the Volans Estate and still Duo hasn't said a word or moved an inch from the unmade twin bed in Howard's place. He sits there like a zombie, clutching at the sheets so hard that sometimes Heero is forced to wash the bloodstains clean off. He hasn't tried to talk to his braided ex-partner for fear of saying the wrong words, for causing any more trouble in his life. All he does for now is sit there patiently and care for him as best he can.

On the third morning, Heero awakes to Duo standing by the window, staring out the brilliant sunrise glimmering on the horizon of L2. Heero gets up and hastily walks over to Duo, ready to tell him to get back to bed, but Duo turns to him and smiles and he can't find it in himself to move anymore.

"What do you want from me?" Duo asks gingerly, still smiling airily. Heero stands before him, slightly slack-jawed and without a proper response. He felt abnormally helpless in the situation, wanting simultaneously not to cause him further pain and to make him smile sincerely.

Duo faces him, exposing his entire being by looking at Heero in a way he has refused to do so until now. His expression is heartbreakingly delicate, so much so that Heero knows he'll never forget it for as long as he lives. His hair is blown all around by the wan breezes, floating around him and hitting the sunlight in magical angles. Duo approaches him in elegant strides, lifting his bruised arm and resting it upon Heero's shoulderblade. His arm snakes behind Heero's head; and then Heero feels his long, skillful fingers sliding through his matted hair discreetly, lingering until Heero feels moved enough to lean into them subconsciously.

Next thing he knows, Duo's cheek is up against his, taut and war-hardened, smelling of reconnaissance.

"I'm in love with you," Duo murmurs sweetly into his ear. "But I can't do this anymore, Heero. I've got nothing left to give you. I've got nothing left."

Duo backs away from him slowly, enough to see his face, and observes him with careful, loving eyes. "There's nothing left for me here or anywhere. So there's nothing for you to wait around for anymore, Heero. It's over. Just go." He kisses Heero on the cheek and begins to walk back to his bed, but he feels a firm grip take hold of his wrist.

Duo turns around and faces Heero once more. "I was counting on your skills from the beginning," says Heero. "So do me a favor and don't give up so easily when nothing's been lost."

They gaze at each other, once more swallowed by a silence neither could explain.

"I'm… still here, Duo," Heero says, fumbling for the words—fumbling into a grey uncertainty. "I'm here… for you. So… there must be something left for me to wait for. There's something left…"

…_Something worth saving, left here. So I'll save you. From them and from yourself, if I have to._

And for that moment in time, they realize the absence of weight between them and pray for it to last.

--

**NOTES**

- Italicized quote is series dialogue.

- It's Duo's truck, loaded with the ammunition and grenades he'd asked from Wufei, that decimated the retreating troops.

- Because it's so important for me that people read "The Second Coming" in order to fully grasp the nature of what surrounds Duo, I included it in this chapter. It's a poem worth knowing.

**Big huge thanks to**: Dyna Dee (so flattering! I'd hug you if I could), pikeebo (for enjoying my penchant for "Bop-It" style twisting and turning), jeangreymullinsjr. (for noticing the ridiculous amount of work, aka the intricacy), angelyn (for your wondrous beyond words support!) and tanya g (for the appreciation, which makes me a happy old chap!). As you can see by the dwindling length of each chapter, the story is drawing to a close. Stay tuned for the finale!


	9. Accidental Babies

Chapter Nine

Accidental Babies

--

-- Well, I held you like a lover: happy hands  
-- And your elbow in the appropriate place  
-- And we ignored each other's happy plans  
-- For that delicate look upon your face  
-- Our bodies moved and hardened  
-- Hurting parts of your garden  
-- With no room for a pardon  
-- In a place where no one knows what we have done

-- And I know I make you cry,  
-- I know sometimes you wanna die--  
-- But do you really feel alive without me?

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two Squatters: Harold's Place

It's midnight, now, and there is another lying next to Heero Yuy, holding onto him for dear life. He closes his eyes and he feels himself regress into a pool of heat, skin, and addled desperation.

He opens them and finds himself where he was in the morning, eye to eye with Duo Maxwell in all his damaged glory. His heart is beating as rapidly, as if he is enmeshed in a mission, in a war; he feels his muscles ache and relax as they retract, drawing Duo to his chest. His partner looks up at him with wide, glistening eyes—anxious. Heero's arms encircle him at the waist, taking him as close as he can, and nestles his chin on the other's shoulder. Duo answers him with a fierce embrace, collapsing his lungs and opening his desire. Heero holds onto him, moving him backward to the cold, metallic edge of the bed. Duo falls back with his eyes closed and Heero stops refusing.

He straddles Duo on the bed and Duo's eyes flicker open in disbelief. Heero leans his body down, hovering inches above the rigid Duo. Duo begins to speak, but he is silenced by the warmth of Heero's lips softly acquiescing to their dream that would not exist. Duo finally stops thinking and pulls Heero down, the heat from their pulsating blood melding their bodies together. Both harden with longing, finding in their long-awaited meeting all the words Heero had ignored all his life and all the time he'd spent as a shadow of himself.

He is finding himself in the smooth, naked crook of Duo's neck, in the sinewy arms winding themselves around him, in the jaded sounds of pleasure poorly suppressed against Heero's rapid movements. He discovers himself by discovering the other, seeing reflections of a future he's never seen. In Duo's violet eyes, there is no Sanc Kingdom, no necessity, no urgency, no mission, and no memory; in Duo's eyes he sees only himself. Duo's limbs tighten all around him and both quicken their pace without abandon. And then he is taken by a piercing, white-hot fire set aflame by the tender whisper of bliss curling in the depths of his ears, saying over and over, "Please don't ever leave…"

This occurs for hours and yet, even driven to the point of sleep, he feels there is still too much between them left unsaid by their lips, fingers, toes, and tongues. His body aches not from going but from stopping short of being able to awaken from the dream his life's been waltzing through. With these thoughts softly dancing in his head, Heero falls asleep.

When Heero opens his eyes again, one burning thought crosses his mind: I've found him. He smiles sincerely, still within a different frame of mind, and fixes his body to match the empty space beside him. He shoots up from his position only to find a video-note littered where Duo had been last night.

At Heero's slightest movement, the note crackles and begins delivering a message through Duo's face and through Duo's voice:

"I'm sorry, Heero. But I can't do this. I can't bear to live this life knowing that I'm responsible for all the death and damage I have caused. There is no place for me on L2 or Earth and therefore there is no place for me in this universe. I have nothing left to do but cease to exist. Please forget about me. I go with God."

But Heero can't accept this. He listens to it twice, thrice, twenty times, and not a single word is processed as real in his head. Inside the words reel the images of their night, their lives, their journey, his breath, scent, and hair, and it just can't be true, he thinks, it can't. Duo'd given everything up for one, brief, shining moment—wasn't it enough?

He gets up and dresses himself with haste, running out of the compound while simultaneously ordering Miss Sphinx to get him a government-ordered vehicle to come pick him up at L2's Southside. Soon after, he dials the number of the only other people left who would care about Duo's death.

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two: Just Outside the Graveyard

Quatre Raberba-Winner and Trowa Barton are standing in what used to be The Graveyard—now just a fire-eaten wasteland littered with dead bodies, wounded Preventers, military tents, and a gaping abyss staring back at them. The flames ate away at the central area of L2, revealing the massive silver foundations raw with circuitry—the ugly remnants of an underground bloodbath with Duo as its target. They remain quiet, sad, surveying the damage of the civil war on L2 with negative nostalgia.

"Seems like the name finally caught up to the place," Trowa says, stepping down from the stack of provisions crates they'd used as leverage. Quatre looks at him disapprovingly as he follows him down to meet Wufei.

"Wufei!" Quatre yells, waving enthusiastically. He takes Wufei in his arms before the slight Chinese man has a chance to escape. Thanks to Quatre's genes, he'd outgrown Wufei by at least a few inches, which ires him inwardly. Nevertheless, he reluctantly returns the embrace and gives an uncomfortable smile for help directed at Trowa. Fortunately, Quatre releases him soon after.

Wufei guides them into the headquarters' main tent. Both men sit at the stools provided and inspect the plans and reports splayed out on the table before them. After a few minutes of going over recent events, Quatre sighs and buries his head in his hands.

"I can't help but feel as if it's my fault, somehow," Quatre cries in anguish. "I feel like I should have paid attention to the signs. If I did, maybe none of this would have happened and Duo wouldn't have had to go through this!"

Trowa forcefully takes the blonde into his arms and holds him there, catching both Quatre and Wufei off-guard.

"None of this is your fault," Trowa whispers reassuringly. Quatre stops crying immediately and begins to laugh lightly.

"You're right, Trowa," Quatre says. "I'm just being me again." Trowa releases him after this and uncharacteristically blushes.

"Well," Wufei says, a bit taken aback. "I assume the Maganac Corps are on their way as well?"

"They're already here," Trowa explains. "We've dispersed some to parts of the colony where the Networks are located, except the Volans Estate."

"I see. So I take it that you met with ESUN troops over there?"

"Yes, an overwhelming amount," Quatre says, removing pictures from his pocket given to him by Rasid. "We decided against involving the Maganac troops with them, so as not to generate confusion."

"But," Trowa wonders quietly. "That begs the question as to _why_ ESUN troops would exclusively be at the Volans Estate."

"I'd like to know the answer to that, myself," Wufei replies. "But Relena didn't tell me anything about it. It's not necessarily a bad thing, though I would like the troops to be helping out here instead, but I assume it just has something to do with finding Duo."

"Duo was at the Volans Estate?" Quatre asks vociferously. "Well, is he okay?"

"I don't know if he was there. All I know is that they've got Volans in custody now and he's not talking. Also," Wufei pauses, digging from underneath the pile of papers a report bearing a familiar face. "They found Hilde. Seems like she was working directly with the ESUN for at least part of the time that she was posing as Volans' partner, Grizel Liegen."

But before either ex-pilot before Wufei can respond to his piece of shocking news, the video receiver in the tent rings. Wufei answers it to find Heero Yuy, distressed, inside a vehicle.

"Heero?" Answers Quatre brightly, running to the screen. "Are you with Duo? Is he alright?" Heero sees Quatre and understands why his phone calls to the Winner Estate were fruitless.

"I rescued him from Volans' hidden underground safehouse," Heero says, a pained rage evident in his voice. "This morning, he left me a note suggesting suicide."

"That doesn't sound like him," Trowa says in the background.

"Well, he did lose everything he cares about, Trowa," Wufei says. "He was already on the verge of insanity when I was with him. It wouldn't surprise me if he's finally had enough."

"He's not dead." Heero says coldly, stopping all their words with his fierce gaze. They are driven to silence—Quatre afraid and Wufei perplexed by the certainty of his statement.

"What happened between you two?" Trowa asks bluntly. Heero is wordless, but the very instant Heero's face softens visibly—the instant he allows them to realize _why not_—they immediately comprehend what had happened between the two.

"I need you to access a computer right now," Heero orders. Wufei nods and removes a laptop from underneath his table and places it on the desk. He turns it on.

"What next?"

"Open your tracking system and input the following code," Heero commands, giving him a series of numbers and letters. "That corresponds with the tracking chip I had my surgeons insert into Duo. Where is he?"

"Hold on," Wufei says, waiting impatiently for the tracker to load the image. "It says he's on the Southside of L2 in an unregistered building."

Heero's eyes widen in disbelief. "Are you sure?" He asks with panic. Wufei nods.

"Yeah, it says he's not moving from the location," Wufei turns to him, interest piqued at the lengths Heero had gone through to ensure Duo's safety. Because of this, he can't help but ask: "So he really told you?"

Heero looks at Wufei sadly. "That doesn't matter now," He responds, leaning back into the car seat, sorrow written clear across his face. "That's the location he was taken from. He found the chip and took it out. I can't find him this time. He's gone."

Silence winds out like a musical between all four of them, with only the whirring of chopper blades, indistinct shouting of men, and dull revving engines to break it. Heero is pensively looking downwards and it is a few minutes at least before Wufei gathers the courage to speak his thoughts.

"Heero, it may only be me who thinks this, but I feel as if there's another player in this game,"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, if Volans has already been apprehended and Hilde has been found, and you feel for certain that Duo had no reason to leave or commit suicide, then the only answer to it is that something else has happened. Perhaps he's been taken in by someone else who knows about Wing Zero."

"That's impossible," Quatre says, flustered by the insecurity of the situation. "We're the only ones who know!"

"Wrong, Quatre," Trowa says broodingly. "Relena knows. And perhaps all of the ESUN knows, as well."

"No, I doubt the ESUN knows," Heero says, massaging his temples. "Someone would have reported it to me. I've kept my lines open all this time in case something else happens and all my subordinates know to contact me if the condition necessitates.

"Listen, I'm about to enter the Peace Wing offices here in L2. I need you to update and forward to me all the places you've previously listed Duo would go to. Meanwhile, I'll be the one to ask Relena if she knows anything about his whereabouts."

Heero nods in thanks and they say all say their good-byes half-heartedly. Heero looks outside his window at the decrepit facades of L2's buildings and his heart is wrenched by a vehement question.

_Why?_

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two: Peace Wing Containment Complex

Vice Foreign Minister Relena Peacecraft watches the ex-Gundam pilot, Duo Maxwell, from behind a one-way mirror; she observes his pitiful, offhand, silent routine in the lone metal chair inside the interrogation room he's in. His face is riddled with healing cuts, his blood a patent red underneath the harsh fluorescent lights glaring down on him. His hands are behind his head and his legs are splayed forward, recumbent and foolishly nonchalant. After three hours of quiet without company, Duo Maxwell sits upright and begins to whistle a tune unfamiliar to her. Then he begins to sing.

_Once again, I'm in trouble with my own friend  
She is paperin' the window panes  
She is putting on a smile  
Livin' in a glass house_

_Well, of course I'd like to sit around and chat  
Well, of course I'd like to stay and chew the fat  
Well, of course I'd like to sit around and chat  
But someone's listening in…_

Relena smirks at Duo's song, understanding it as an invitation for discussion. She orders her officers to escort her into the room. Duo's ears perk up when he hears the pressurized locks give in, and he awaits to see the identity of his kidnapper, the one who's been behind it all along… and when he finally sees who it is, his jaw drops and his train of thought stops in its tracks.

"Relena," He says hoarsely, unable to get the name out of his throat. He looks at her with an utterly confounded expression. Relena smiles gracefully and bows before him, her stiff cream-colored and heavily-decorated uniform rustling with every movement.

"Presenting Vice Foreign Minister Relena Peacecraft," One of the also-heavily-decorated men in blue besides her states valiantly. "For safety reasons, we are to bind your hands and feet while in the presence of her royal highness. Any retaliation is to be interpreted as an act of war and will result in inevitable collateral damage."

Duo stares at the man with a look of incredulity. Relena smiles widely and pats the officer on the shoulder. "That is not necessary, Colonel Neji," She says cordially, as is expected of the leader of the free world. Still the same kind Relena, Duo thinks, until she says, "At least, at the moment."

She looks at him with the same face, yet Duo knows there's an underlying motive to her sweet disposition. Does she know about Wing Zero? He thinks, Has she always known? She approaches him and stands directly in front of him, still smiling. Duo is unclear on how to react so he smiles his typical smile.

"To what do I owe this kidnapping, your majesty?" He asks, leaning back into his chair to face her more easily.

"Where is Wing Zero's head, Duo?" She says without abandon and, scarily, very congenially. Duo's stare hardens into a volatile mix of wrath and disbelief.

"I'm sorry, Minister, I'm afraid you've mistaken me for someone else, 'cause I don't know what you're talkin' about," He answers hollowly.

"You are in no position to lie to me, Duo Maxwell, Gundam pilot once or not," In a flash, Relena's countenance turns the room cold. Her gaze rivals Duo's defiance with staunch, clear power. "You are going to give me the location of the Gundam head or your life is forfeit."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Relena," Duo repeats, unswerving.

Relena sighs and walks back to her previous position. Another officer enters the room and provides a seat for her, which she cordially receives and sits herself upon. She and Duo are in an invisible palace, she being the Queen, and he being a criminal on his knees before her. His life is on her hands as it has been from the start.

"It is imperative that our government obtains the Gundam head, Duo, for the safety of the entire Earth Sphere United Nations," She explains, calmly folding her hands on her lap. "You were once a soldier for the cause of peace. Has ten years really changed you that much that you would risk the ESUN for your own selfish causes?"

"Have you changed so much that you'd risk the lives of my family in order to pursue your peace?" He spits out aggressively, challenging her. "Tell me what they ever did to you, Relena, why you had to let them die! Why you'd let anyone on L2 die for the sake of a goddamn Gundam head that wasn't going anywhere!"

She smiles. "I am not aware that I have caused you any suffering, as I have ordered nothing of the sort; I know only that you are responsible for the civil war on L2 and that you are harboring property that rightfully belongs with the ESUN government.

"And whether you give it up now, easily, or await with uncertainty the repercussions of your defiance, is entirely up to you.

"And remember: it's only business, Duo. Nothing personal." She gets up elegantly and bows to him. She turns to her officers and wordlessly gives them an order. Duo watches her regally exit and the two officers with her remain with him in the room. Inside him, the sliver of hope he's always held crumples up into an entity so miniscule he can no longer see its light.

--

As soon as the car swings near to the sidewalk of the Peace Wing Containment Complex, Heero bursts out like a maverick electron in an atom driven to its energy peak. He walks down the halls as if he is sprinting to the edge of the universe, navigating through soldiers, bureaucrats, and high-end officials all greeting him in submission to his position as Principal of Peace. When he reaches his destination—that is, the pristine white double-doors leading into the Vice Foreign Minister's chambers—he braces himself for the answers he is looking for.

He turns the golden doorknobs carefully and enters with the requisite composure of a leader of the ESUN. He bows to Relena, who is seated primly in full uniform behind a large, circular glass desk.

"How prompt of you, Principal," She says with amusement. "I wasn't sure I expressed the emergency so well, but apparently I did."

"Pardon?" Heero asks, seating himself on a chair adjacent to the table, confused. "There's an emergency I'm not aware of?"

"Of course there's an emergency, Heero," Relena replies, "You of all people should be aware of what the emergency is."

Heero stares at her, distressed by her choice of words. "I'm not sure I understand, Minister,"

"Funny," She responds. "That's also what he's saying."

Heero's distress turns into disbelief not unlike Duo's. Relena regards him flippantly but her indignation is finally clear to him as his realization dawns.

"You have a duty, Heero," Relena states. "You have a duty as the Earth Sphere United Nations' Principal of Peace to protect me, to protect the colonies, to protect the Earth, and, most importantly, to protect the people.

"Now, you have performed this duty perfectly and magnificently for the past ten years and it would pain me greatly to have you excommunicated from this position, but if you refuse to act correctly, I will have no other choice."

Relena stands up and walks towards the wall of windows behind her, the setting sun a picture of unspeakable grandeur in contrast to the horrible choice facing Heero.

"You will obtain the location of the Gundam Wing Zero's head from Duo," She states, "Or you will not. The choice is yours."

--

Duo writhes on the floor, covered in his own blood. He can feel the blood welling up in his chest, knowing the familiar pain of broken ribs. His labored breathing resonates in the interrogation room and is music only to the officers standing above him.

"This bastard's got a lot of nerve keepin' his mouth shut like this," says Colonel Neji, a bulky Japanese man with false blue eyes. The officer beside him, a similarly-built Egyptian, kicks Duo hard enough that the ex-pilot skids on the floor and hits the opposite wall, eliciting an agonized yelp. "Nice one, Zahur."

Colonel Zahur approaches Duo to continue the beating until he is interrupted from his actions by the unlocking of the interrogation room. Duo closes his eyes and croaks out a quiet laugh.

"What, two men aren't enough?" He says in between pained chuckles. "Or maybe I'm already dead and it's God playin' a joke on me…"

"Not God, Duo," Heero Yuy says. Duo's eyes snap open upon hearing the words. "Just me." He bends down and lifts Duo's body upwards, forcing the beaten-down, braided man to face him.

Duo gazes at nothing in particular, absolutely lifeless. He stares at the fluorescent lights but he sees nothing but the shadows in the vacuum of hopelessness. As Heero asks him quietly, tenderly, for the location of the Gundam head, the small, incandescent hope in Duo's system flickers out of existence, accompanied the unheard tinkling of a heart breaking.

"Duo," Heero says softly, brushing the hair out of Duo's face despite the blots of blood he catches on his fingers. "Please—"

"If you follow the underground subway, it strays into a different direction hidden by a simulated wall," Duo whispers, barely audible. "The electricity's probably been blown by the explosion so the entrance is exposed. If you follow it, you'll find the warehouse under the Maxwell Church. That's where you'll find your truth."

Heero observes him paling in his arms after his confession. The longer Heero holds him, the more he sees Duo fading away into a psychological chasm—one that Heero's afraid he can't bring him back from. He grips Duo's shoulders and shakes him, attempts to wake him from his stupor. But Duo doesn't respond.

Heero embraces him, uncaring of the stains now emblazoned into his uniform. He can feel something wet gather in his eyes but is gripped with shock when he feels his gun sliding out of his pocket.

He quickly releases Duo, whose fingers have already released the safety to Heero's gun. Heero, as if he is watching everything in slow motion, reaches out his hand to grab the weapon before Duo has a chance to fire at his head. Heero manages to swing hard enough at Duo's hand, twisting it and forcing the bullet to his own arm instead.

Heero is thrown back by the shot, but he managed during the occurrence to whip the weapon away from Duo. The officers, as well as other guards, disable the lock and prepare to enter the room with intent to kill.

"Stop!" Heero commands loudly, forcing the men to pull back. "Stay out of here!"

"But Principal—" says one of the men.

"Don't question my order!" He yells. "And get me a medic," He pants, gripping his arm in pain as he stands up. The officers leave the room and leave the two men to their devices but watching carefully from behind the window.

Before Heero as a chance to apologize to Duo—to explain everything—Relena enters the room. She walks in silence, picking up Heero's gun from the floor, and hands it to an officer who immediately leaves. Heero looks at her firmly, falsely victorious. She bends down, smiles, and kisses him. Heero's body become rigid at her touch.

"Mission accomplished, Principal Yuy," She says out loud for Duo to hear, even in his comatose state. "Now repeat what he said to you and we will get our troops there immediately."

Heero looks at Duo, despondence and regret in his eyes. "No," Heero says, grasping Relena's arm. She looks at him inquisitively. "Let me get it. Let me deal with it. It's… my duty."

Relena smiles. "As you wish, Principal," She says.

She leaves the room and a team of medics come rushing in. They place Duo in a stretcher and attach an IV immediately. As Heero is put into his own, he says, "I need you to put him in suicide-watch custody. Make sure there is no way for him to escape without anyone knowing."

One medic nods and runs off to deliver his message to different officers present. Heero closes his eyes and finds he can think of only Duo.

"_For how long, Duo?" I ask, biting his ear as if it's something I've always done. That, of course, is not true. I've never done such a thing. I've never felt the want to. But I do, now, somehow._

_When he turns to face me with his big, bright, violet eyes—haunting, beautifully-colored eyes only owned by those of his lineage—I feel like all these little acts complete us. They complete me. He looks at me with a deep sadness that touches me even though I don't know it, never felt it. He runs his fingers down my chest, playing, until he can offer me a substantial answer. After all, how to explain us—even I don't know._

"_For as long as I can remember the feeling of love," He says with a smile. "Cheesy, isn't it?" He laughs, burying his embarrassed head into the crook of my neck. "It's because I don't know how long. I've been afraid of it all my life so I've never really given it much thought. But I know it's been a long time. Maybe even before I met you, I knew I'd love you or someone like you. But,"_

_And he stops, holding me tightly as if I'm going to fly off somewhere. I return his embrace, trying to be as comforting as possible and finding it simple. He relaxes and breathes deeply, matching his pulse with mine._

"_But I didn't want to lose you." He says. He looks up at me with that patented Maxwell smile that even I got used to, but I know that smile holds a lot of darkness. "I know you think it's a stupid reason, but you see, I'm cursed to lose the ones I love. With Hilde and my salvaging family, I thought I was free. But, as you can see, I was wrong. I'm always wrong. Even now, I'm afraid I'm wrong. I'm afraid I've sentenced you to death, Heero Yuy. I hope you'll forgive me."_

_The sound of his voice drifts off after this and all I'm left to hear is the beating of our hearts as one. The smell of his hair is intoxicating. I could care less about his confession because it's stupid._

"_Idiot," I murmur into his ear and I feel him stiffen in my arms. I smile and face him, brushing his untamed hair away from his face. "You really are a glass house, aren't you,"_

_His face contorts and I hold back a small laugh. "What the hell does that mean, anyway? "Glass house?" Who are you, Lewis Carroll?"_

_I kiss him, deeply, as I've never kissed another in my lifetime. "It means I'll never leave you, Duo. Even in death, I won't leave you."_

_I expect happiness to return to his face for the first time since I've seen him, but the only thing I find is that same aching sadness._

_He says, "I believe you," but his face tells me he's saying, Yes, you will, Heero Yuy. You will leave me._

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two: Above the Maxwell Church

Heero, with his arm conveniently in a sling, surveys the area as his helicopter brings him down to the excavation site. There, he can see the Maganac Corps already making headway with the extrapolation of the giant head from the hole where the Maxwell Church had once stood. Chains, poles, and ropes are all around; Heero drops down from a ladder so the blades won't catch on anything. He is lowered to an elevator tower, and as soon as his feet touches the ground he waves back to the pilot in thanks.

He turns around and is greeted heartily by Quatre, followed by Trowa and Wufei. Quatre looks at his arm and Heero reassures him that he's okay.

"Just a flesh wound," Heero says dismissively. The four ex-pilots enter the elevator and go down several floors to the ground floor. From the elevator's small window, Heero can see the all-too-familiar outlines and colors of Wing Zero, his old best friend. When he exits, his breath is caught in his throat in awe and wistfulness. Wufei grabs his shoulder and squeezes it gently, smiling at Heero.

"Brings back memories, doesn't he?" Wufei says, sighing. "Can't be helped, though. This thing's only for war."

Wufei separates from their group and approaches a group of workers, giving them detailed directions. Quatre excuses himself to speak with some Corps members. Trowa stands beside Heero, who is observing Wing Zero's head very pensively.

"Can you believe he gave up his entire life for this thing?" Trowa asks perceptively. He nudges Heero's shoulder, causing the other to look him straight in the eye. "You should take a close look at Wing Zero before we get rid of him… again."

"Why?" Heero asks, full of melancholy. "He hasn't changed at all. Nothing ever changes."

"You're half wrong, Heero," Trowa says, walking away. "Yes, some things don't change, like sunrise, sunset, the existence of life and death. But it goes hand-in-hand that some things _do_. And by now, you should know that better than anybody."

Heero watches as Trowa joins Quatre's side, earning him a glowing smile from the shorter Arabic man. Heero exhales and approaches the edge of Wing Zero's neckline. Wires and machinery peep out from underneath the suspended visage of his old Gundam. The wind moves through them and they swing about as if they are waving to their former master. Heero places his hand on the cold Gundanium alloy, feeling the emptiness of the machine beneath his fingertips.

_Can you believe he gave up his entire life for this thing?_

Heero's hand curls up into a ball against Wing Zero's exterior in an attempt to grab hold of something alive in it. He bows his head down, feeling that unfamiliar anguish taking over him again. His chest feels tight, like there's no air around him; he decides to keep walking in order to rid himself of the discomfort inside him.

And then his hands brush against something on the back of Wing Zero's neck. It's something tiny, like measured scratches on a prisoner's self-made calendar on the cell wall. He turns around and sees, in beautiful script, a dedication. And then Heero is consumed by an alien emotion linked inexorably to his braided ex-partner, Duo Maxwell.

_To Heero, For He Wanted the Kingdom of God on Earth_

--

**NOTES**

- _They are having hot sweaty yummy desperate ghey sex mmkay?_

- The song Duo's singing is called "Life in a Glass House" by Radiohead.

- All the ultimatums in this fic are supposed to remind you of the mafia. Yeah, I love being obvious.

- The italicized parts are from their night together before Duo's kidnapping.

- Lewis Carroll wrote Alice in Wonderland.

- Duo's dedication is from _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_ (it's the main character Tomas' inscription on his grave from his son)

I'm so sorry for making you guys wait so long for this chapter! But I am currently in the middle of FINALS HELL!! Hell, I tell you! And so I reward you with this painfully long chapter which took forever to get out of my system. I hope it was sorta at least kinda worth the wait. There's only one chapter left, and it's sort of just an epilogue, to tie up all the loose ends and give our couple a happy ending… or will I? I guess you'll just have to see! Please stay tuned and I hope you enjoyed this one!

**MY UNDYING LOVE TO THE FOLLOWING FOR REVIEWING**

Calamithy, Angelyn, jeangreymullinsjr., Weebesom, snowdragonct, Dyna Dee, pikeebo, and Tanya G

**AND MY UNBOUNDED GRATITUDE TO THE FOLLOWING FOR READING**

Daja666, Dinc, Kinara, LlewellynPrince, Nyelo, tmbrwlf, twisteddagger, and xxSilverLemonFlyxx


	10. Sleep, Don't Weep

Chapter Ten

Sleep, Don't Weep

--

-- Sleep, don't weep, my sweet love  
-- My face, it's all wet  
-- 'Cause my day was rough  
-- So do what you must do  
-- To find yourself  
-- Wear another's shoe  
-- Paint my shelves  
-- **There's times that I was broke  
-- And you stood strong  
-- I hope I find a place  
-- Where I feel I belong**

--

A.C. 205 – Lagrange Two: North Hospital

Nine hours after the incident at the Containment Complex, Duo was put under surveillance in the psych floor of north L2's hospital and has been there ever since. The Vice Foreign Minister Relena Peacecraft is speaking a speech inaudible to the comatose Duo on the television, absolving him of his crimes by forgetting to mention his exact involvement in what they're now calling the "L2 Network Conflict of A.C. 205."

"It will go down in history as a day when peace triumphed once more against the powers of greed and violence," she says, sparkling in her cream-colored uniform on a stage spanning the great hole that was the Graveyard. When she raises her hand and gives a victorious wave, the crowds clap and holler like ecstatic creatures escaping a burning forest. They clap until their hands bleed hope back into the ground of L2, lasting almost thirty minutes. She leaves the stage and then soon after the animals are gone, leaving only a residue of optimism.

The locks on Duo's door give in, but he doesn't move an inch. It's Hilde, carrying a thick, ochre notebook and a blood-red rose (Duo's classic favorite, despite its kitsch—he used to say to Hilde about red roses, "It's a reprehensible preference—I think. I like things I'm not so sure about."). At that memory, she's able to smile when she walks in, but all her memories lose their taste when she sees Duo.

She removes the wilted flowers on Duo's glass bedside table and replaces them with the new one she's brought. She spends time arranging it in different directions, in actuality trying to think of what to say—trying to consummate in language the elephant in the room. But she finds what's left between them has been irredeemably lost. After a while, she seats herself next to Duo's cadaverous body and places her warm, calloused hands over his.

"I'm not sorry, Duo," She says quietly. "When I first approached Volans, I thought retrieving the Gundam head would be simple because I assumed you would have done anything to get me back if you knew I'd just been taken. But as time passed, I realized that wasn't the case. It became crystal clear the day I heard you had gone to _him_ for help. That day, I realized your mission was no longer to save me or the life that you say you loved. But, of course, you were much too blind to see that yourself. So you destroyed your old life by refusing to give up Wing Zero, slowly but surely; I only helped you on your way.

"I'm not sorry about what I've done to you or to the people you loved. I'm not sorry for the innocent lives I claimed. I'm not sorry that I betrayed you and ruined what you believed to be the perfect life for you. I regret none of it."

She smiles brightly at Duo as tears run obstinately down her reddened cheeks, impassioned with sincerity.

"I made my choices knowing fully what I was sacrificing, Duo. I did what I thought was right… for you, for me—for everyone. I want to show you what it is to live again, Duo. I saw it dimming in your eyes the longer we were together, pursuing a kind of life that would have never made you as happy as you could be. And I would have doomed myself to the same fate had I let it go on, out of sheer stupidity. So I stopped fooling myself and realized you'd never love me the way I deserve to be loved.

"Don't blame Relena Peacecraft for this. She was hardly involved, except in the end, because I knew I wouldn't be able to stop you myself, even with Volans behind me, if it got to that point. I kept it a secret to protect the rest of the colony and the ESUN itself. I kept it a secret for you. But I could only predict how far you'd go. And it so happens that I know you better than you know yourself, after all..."

She removes herself from Duo's side, feeling somewhat like a rootless tree as she glides to the door, for once unburdened with her own internal war. She wipes her eyes dry, donning a pair of opaque sunglasses in order to hide the scarlet misery in her eyes. She places her hand on the door but doesn't open it.

"I have no right to ask anything from you, but in spite of that, I want you to do something for me before I step out of your life forever,"

A pause.

"Don't run away this time, Duo. Don't let him go," She says with a wan smile, away from where Duo can see. "Then perhaps all of this would be worth something for you in the end." She leaves without another word, and the only sound to comfort Duo is the din of pundits discussing the latest speech given by the Minister and the faint barking of the dogs outside his titanium-barred window.

--

When Duo awakes soundlessly in the morning, his blurry eyes form the image of Heero Yuy in white bent above him, cleansing his wounds. His body, still numb from the anesthetic, is unable to react. All he feels is his heart rate increasing rapidly due to a deep-seated resentment that has finally released itself from its self-built prison in Duo's psyche.

But as his vision clears, he realizes it's not Heero, but just a resident nurse. He's accompanied by another nurse, busily preparing a stretcher for Duo in order to change his bedding. "Good morning, Mr. Solo," greets the handsome nurse erroneously as he removes Duo's bandages. Duo responds with nothing more than the same vacant look he's had for the past thirty-six hours. He looks down at the nurse's hands nimbly unraveling his bandages, which are indurated with blood, pus, and congealed medicines. It's as if the nurse is peeling layers of coconut skins from Duo's body, and the more he removes the worse Duo feels. And, like a coconut, there's nothing inside him but air and fluids—and with nothing inside him left, he can't fight back.

Duo closes his eyes and lets himself be ably handled up and down from his position, on and off his bed, in and out of his clothes. By the end of their routine, Duo feels stripped of his own skin and clinically spotless. He imagines himself as Christ lying prostrate on Mary's lap, like the sculpture named Pietà he'd seen in a book Solo'd stolen from a library and given to him as a throwaway present. "A crazy kid like you'd probly like this," Solo'd said.

_After he moved into the Maxwell Church, he showed Sister Helen and Father Maxwell the portrait of the sculpture and asked them what it was about._

"_What's wrong with him?" Duo asked, pointing at Jesus. "He's like a big baby or somethin', layin' on that woman's lap like that."_

_Sister Helen blushed, unsure of what to say. She looked at Father Maxwell, who was softly laughing. "Well, you see, Duo…" She began uncertainly._

"_This is Christ as he died for our sins, Duo," Father Maxwell said comfortingly. "Mary, his mother, is grieving his passing in prayer."_

"_Why the heck is she praying and holding him like that?" Duo asked, irritated at the woman's oddity. "He's got to be too heavy for a woman to carry like that and pray at the same time! She should just put him down and _then_ pray."_

_Sister Helen's face turned embarrassingly redder than before at Duo's hapless comments, afraid of Father Maxwell's reaction, but the old priest merely grinned in amusement. He closed Duo's book and bent down to face the young, baby-faced orphan boy._

"_You know what Jesus used to say to people who carried heavy things?"_

"_No," Duo replied succinctly, confidently. "What kind of heavy things are we talkin' 'bout?"_

"_Oh, just about anything heavy—for instance, people who carry big sacks of bricks or wood to build houses for their families, or parents who carry their children on their backs while they work. But it's not just the physical kind of heaviness that Jesus talks about."_

"_What other kinda heavy stuff is there?"_

"_Well, the heart can be heavy sometimes too. And also your mind. When you've experienced many things in your life, you will understand just how much weight your mind and heart can carry."_

"_They can't really carry that much, right?" He queries petulantly, kicking his feet on the church's floorboards. "They're so small. They'd break real easy, I bet."_

_Father Maxwell smiled sincerely, making Duo's eyes light up when he saw him do so. He liked it when Father Maxwell smiled at him like that because it made him feel wanted._

"_You're absolutely correct, Duo," Father Maxwell said. "That's precisely why Jesus used to tell those who came to him something I will now tell you, but you have to promise to remember it for as long as you live. Will you do that, Duo?"_

"_Sure!" Duo exclaimed without hesitation as he was curious about this Jesus fellow and all his shenanigans._

"_He said to them, 'Come to me all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.'"_

For the rest of that day, and all the days after the Tragedy, Duo practiced committing the words to memory as if they were Father Maxwell's words, not Jesus'. Whenever he repeated the words in his head, they were able to bring him back time and time again from the depths of his unfathomable pathos. But, currently, he doesn't know if they will be able to do it this time.

These memories calm him until the nurses leave him and he feels safe enough to open his eyes in the solitude. But as his eyes adjust to dawn's soothing light, his hearts hardens at the image that forms in front of him.

"Good morning, Duo," says Heero Yuy, in the flesh. Duo's lungs freeze and his breath stops temporarily at his recognizance of his ex-partner's face and voice. Duo sits still and stares at the wall behind Heero, unwilling to face the other man ever again. He doesn't budge even as Heero walks over to the chair by his bedside and seats himself next to him.

"I… came to tell you that the Wing Zero has been eliminated once and for all," Heero says comfortingly, reminding Duo of Father Maxwell, but it's obvious that the Heero's voice isn't used to it. "Our technology has progressed to the point where our reserve of anti-war weaponry was enough to disintegrate even Gundanium alloy in space."

After that, Heero becomes silent for a prolonged period of time, staring at Duo's deathlike pallor and how well it fades into his grey room. The words he'd practiced on the space shuttle are lingering in his throat and mind, collecting dust as they remain unsaid. The pause grows steadily pregnant between them, each minute threatening to deliver his deepest thoughts and concerns for Duo like accidental babies between an unwed couple.

"I…" Heero begins, and once again feels that unusual pang return in his chest. He ignores it for the necessity of the situation. "I also came here to… to thank you, Duo, for… everything." In the end, Heero's words falter wretchedly, managing to elicit a bitter, mordant laugh from Duo, who's had just about enough from the Principal of Peace.

"I'm sure I've said it before," Duo drawls in an uncharacteristically corrosive manner, "But I'm pretty serious, especially now, when I say _fuck you, Heero Yuy_."

Heero narrows his eyes, slightly enraged by Duo's reaction. He gets up and puts his arms on both sides of Duo's bed so as to force the other man to face him eye to eye. Duo stares back glibly.

"_What do you want from me_?" Heero asks heatedly.

"I want you to get out of my life!" Duo answers with equivalent ardor, grabbing Heero by his pristine ivory tie and bringing him close to his face. "Who do you think you are to me that you can go around saying whatever the hell you want to me without expecting any repercussions? I've told you repeatedly that _I don't want you near me_, but you never fucking listened! You just kept shoving yourself back into my life when there was no room for you to be there! I just wanted your help, but you just had to come in and make me suffer all this love bullshit again and for what? For _what?_ For fucking _nothing_. You said you would never leave and _you_ _fucking left me_ for your precious fucking princess _again_. And now that I'm trying to escape from my misery, you come waltzing in like your royal fucking highness just to prove to me how _worthless_ my existence is?"

Duo gasps for breath after his torrid declaration, loosening his grip on Heero, but instantly finds himself drawn into a cautious, delicate kiss that ends almost as soon as it began. Duo gazes perplexedly, angrily at Heero and identifies the look on the other's face as one between amusement and empathy. He feels Heero's fingers charily curl in his unbraided hair and he is shocked into repose.

"You're not as fragile I as thought you were," Heero murmurs, "All this pain inside of you and you're still able to function, still able to feel anger, hate, love... You're still able to retain your humanity in the face of incomprehensible chaos. You think every ounce of pain you lock into your glass house will only break you in the end, but nothing ever truly has. So perhaps you're not as fragile as _you_ think you are. Perhaps you're not a glass house after all." Heero's mouth is still sitting on Duo's lips, infrequently nuzzling forward and forcing Duo's eyes to close in compliance.

"You're wrong," Duo replies breathily. "I'm damaged beyond repair. I'm not a glass house; I'm a broken mirror. There's not a mechanic in the world who could salvage the shit heap that is Duo Maxwell."

"We'll see about that," Heero says. He pushes Duo back with his lips, this time forcefully opening Duo up to himself—to a future denied and now unlocked. Tears pool in Duo's tightly-shut eyes against his will, drenching his cheeks and making their way down Heero's neck. In his mind's eye, Duo can feel Sister Helen kissing his forehead, telling him, _sleep, don't weep, my love. _They move to breath and Heero leans into his ear and whispers with all the gravity he can muster,

"_This time, Duo, please count on me_."

--

A.C. 207 – Lagrange Two: The Graveyard

Duo Maxwell can't pinpoint exactly when he'd started smoking—but those days are long gone now, what with the hundred-fifty kids he's got running around in what the papers advertise as "The Maxwell Boarding School for Orphans." His kids, despite his protests, boastfully refer to it as their Graveyard.

He swivels on his chair, tapping his foot lightly on the floor. "So, you'll all be here tomorrow to celebrate the school's opening, right?" He says towards a video-receiver on the wall. Quatre's pearly whites beam with excitement, while Trowa and Wufei linger in the background, amused. They all nod in one way or another and Quatre spends the next five minutes showering Duo with praise fit for a king. He gives them the time and place for dinner and they part with joy, until tomorrow.

Duo gets up from behind his cherry oak desk, which is littered with colorful toys, stacks of papers, books, and a dozen fresh white roses in a glass vase. From behind a leather-bound copy of Yukio Mishima's _The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With the Sea_ peeks the corner of a gold-gilded photo of Heero Yuy with him lingering in the background.

He walks outside to the front of his office, standing in front of a window that spans nearly the entire width of the façade, to survey the children during their daily recess. The mild afternoon sun glimmers against his loose, softly fluttering chestnut hair and the crisp whiteness of his headmaster's uniform. White was a color that Duo initially dreaded, but since then he's learned to adapt better to certain changes in his rather tumultuous life.

As he observes the smiles on the children's faces while they run around and acknowledge him with disciplined bows and unbounded happiness, Duo's heart skips a beat. This happens almost every time he takes the time to recognize his own satisfaction with life and existence. There are times where he forgets his happiness and remembers how quickly such a mercurial thing is relinquished and replaced with pain, especially when he sees Hilde stand side-by-side with the Vice Foreign Minister on the television, but…

"No braid," says Heero Yuy's familiar, comforting voice beside him, followed with a furtive squeeze of his hand. Duo turns to him and smiles fondly.

…Right now, this is all that matters, Duo thinks.

**THE END**

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FINAL NOTES

- Duo's "rose" preference is another allusion to _The Unbearable Lightness of Being_, this time to the father of the character Sabine

- Michelangelo's sculpture _Pietà_ is referenced, as well as a passage from The New Testament, namely Matthew 11:28-11:30

- Heero's "count on me" is an allusion to a comment he makes to Duo in _Endless Waltz_

- I also make a note of Yukio Mishima's novel, _The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With the Sea_, which is also a source of inspiration, especially regarding the parts dealing with the kind of adolescent fury that's the source of many of the characters' actions.

And finally, no matter how redundant you think I'm being, I'd just like to thank all you readers for the support I feel from you that pushed me to finish the first attempt at a big piece of fiction I've ever made. I was and am really invested in the story I've written, which is something for myself to reflect on as a writer, as well. I appreciate all kinds of comments and criticism because all writers need them. I truly hope you've enjoyed this process as much as me. It's been a pleasure!

THANK YOU ALL!

Angelyn

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Weebesom

Calamithy

SleepSweetPetite

Kinara

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Daja666

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xxSilverLemonFlyxx

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P.S. One last thing. I will be making a site soon specifically for "9" where each chapter will be accompanied by a cover drawing from yours truly. I don't know when I'll begin or finish that, but come back to my space once in a while to check if I've posted the site, if you're interested. Also, no saying what I'll end up writing next, but I've got something big cooking, though it may not be for Gundam Wing… eh, we'll see when the time comes! Catch you cool cats on the flip side.


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